¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2023-05-25 213

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Hello, T.Donna.
It's a peaceful Thursday.
Actually, there was a bad happening.
Dr. MJ was mad about me severely.
Since he sent me a message in a Kakao chat which involves us and other managers just like an order to worker, I told him that I felt bad about it.
Just after that, he pointed out my attitude which is bad that he thought.
I was upset too, but I wanted a peace always as you know.
Hence I apologized for it, but he rejected.
I think he can't feel other's mind, but he is very sensitive about his own emotion.
He likes to give a negative feedback to many people, but he hates to receive any feedback from all people.
What should I do?
Basically, I like him and I can understand him, but it's difficult to solve this.
There is no choice but waiting his acceptance about my apology.
You know what?
I really feel bad about it too, but I have no choice.
I can't stand but drink a whiskey tonight.
As for my assignment, I really hate to make a relationship with criminals.
See you tomorrow.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good evening, Dr. Kim!

It is 8:20 pm on my clock and I wonder if you are driving or pouring whiskey at this time. Nonetheles, thank you for your early homework submission. I had the time to read and suggest some grammar points and analyze a few things about how your day went by.

First of all, your day was peaceful until Dr. MJ sent you and your staff a Kakao message. If I am right, I remember him getting mad in the same way that he did yesterday. This time, it is more complicated because you told him how you felt and he was even mad about that too. So, to be fair, let me ask you and your staff, what have you done to upset Dr. MJ twice this week? Next is, why wouldn't he accept your apology?

If you think that he was being unreasonable for getting mad then you have the right to feel bad about him not accepting your apology. Anyway, in my case, if someone does not accept my apology, I will keep quiet and wait until that person is ready to talk to me. We cannot force people to fogive or feel comfortable about us if the time is not right. However, these situations tarnish relationships and leave a scar. Dr. MJ needs to be careful and respectful on how he deals with you regardless of your mistakes because you are business partners and it means equal rights and responsibilities. In addition, you are still older than him, thus, he has to keep this in mind before 'humiliating' you in the Kakao Group Chat. I think I am adding fuel to the fire. Just stay as peaceful and calm as you can. I know someday, your threshold will be crossed and you will explode. I hope that Dr. MJ will not reach that limit.

Many sentences are correct  and well-structured here on your composition. Continue being patient and diligent. Have a peaceful night!

See you then.

-T. Donna~

Hello, T.Donna.
>> Correct!

It's a peaceful Thursday.
>> Correct!

Actually, there was a bad happening.
>> Correct!
Or: 
Actually, there was a bad (event/ encounter)./ Actually, there was something bad that happened.

Dr. MJ was mad about me severely.
>> Correct!

Since he sent me a message in a Kakao chat which involves us and other managers just like an order to worker, I told him that I felt bad about it.
>> Correct! Very good sentence!

Just after that, he pointed out my attitude which is bad that he thought.
>> Correct!

I was upset too, but I wanted a peace always as you know.
>> I was upset too, but I wanted peace always as you know.

Hence I apologized for it, but he rejected.
>> Correct!

I think he can't feel other's mind, but he is very sensitive about his own emotion.
>> Correct!

He likes to give a negative feedback to many people, but he hates to receive any feedback from all people.
>> Correct!
Or: 
He likes to give a negative feedback to many people, but he hates to receive any feedback.

What should I do?
>> Correct!

Basically, I like him and I can understand him, but it's difficult to solve this.
>> Correct!

There is no choice but waiting his acceptance about my apology.
>> There is no choice but to wait for his acceptance of my apology.

You know what?
>> Correct!

I really feel bad about it too, but I have no choice.
>> Correct!

I can't stand but drink a whiskey tonight.
>> I can't stand but drink whiskey tonight.

As for my assignment, I really hate to make a relationship with criminals.
>> Correct!

See you tomorrow.
>> Correct!

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
128595 How are people enslaved because they owe a debt to someone else? ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-06-01 4
128594 My favorite color ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-01 474
128593 Homework ¾È*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-01 491
128592 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-01 377
128591 New things ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-01 1
128590 Tell me about your most disappointing birthday. ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-06-01 288
128589 Should rape victims abort their unborn children? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-06-01 579
128588 In food shop ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-06-01 1
128587 Do you like taking pictures? Why? ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-06-01 1
128586 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-01 678
128585 My YouTube channel! ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-06-01 292
128584 Homework ÀÌ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-06-01 473
128583 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-01 1
128582 homework ½Å*ÈÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-01 652
128581 How do you handle conflicts or disagreements? ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-06-01 435
128580 How do you keep in touch with friends or family who live away? ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-06-01 379
128579 6/1 homework ÃÖ*º½ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-01 1004
128578 War ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-01 352
128577 ¼÷Á¦, ¿¡¼¼ÀÌ ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-31 1
128576 homework 05.31 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-05-31 1328

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04