¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

The most dangerous disease

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¾ç*¿¬
2023-05-24 2141

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think the most dangerous disease is incurable disease. And some mental diseases are not able to be cured. With a patient who ia suffering mental diseases including depression, the other members of family have a big grief and stress and they will develop the same mental problems. Actually my oldest daughter used to suffer from panic disorder. At that time it was very difficult to see her suffering the disease and I cried almost every night. In two years she was getting better.Now she is totally healthy. Through my experience, I realize some mental diseases make all the people including the patients have tough times.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Miss Ki Yeon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

I think the most dangerous disease is incurable disease. 
>> I think the most dangerous disease is an incurable disease. 
And some mental diseases are not able to be cured. 
>> CORRECT! 
With a patient who ia suffering mental diseases including depression, the other members of family have a big grief and stress and they will develop the same mental problems. 
>> With a patient who is suffering mental diseases including depression, the other members of family have a big grief and stress and they will develop the same mental problems. 
Actually my oldest daughter used to suffer from panic disorder. 
>> CORRECT! 
OR >> Actually my oldest daughter used to suffer from panic attacks. 
At that time it was very difficult to see her suffering the disease and I cried almost every night. 
>> CORRECT! 
In two years she was getting better.
>> CORRECT! 
Now she is totally healthy. 
>> CORRECT! 
Through my experience, I realize some mental diseases make all the people including the patients have tough times.
>> CORRECT! 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
139594 second homework ÃÖ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-30 1207
139593 first homework ÃÖ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-30 1426
139592 song represents me ±è*ÀÏ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-30 1431
139591 what are the most challenging part of cleaning for you ? ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-30 1421
139590 What do you think of athletes who join the entertainment... ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-08-30 3
139589 When should you stop being honest? ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-08-30 1
139588 Are actors involved in sports more rich than ordinary actors? ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-08-30 2
139587 Q) Are you looking forward to your retirement? ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-30 1098
139586 Should all medicine be free? ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-30 1222
139585 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-08-30 1063
139584 Homework : How do people in your country usually greet each... ÀÌ*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2024-08-30 1264
139583 When are you most productive? ±è*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-08-30 1348
139582 What activities do you tend to be lazy about? ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-08-30 1237
139581 What are some common family duties? ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-30 3
139580 Home work ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-29 3
139579 urope: European He is from Europe, he is European. 1. Mongolia... ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-08-29 1451
139578 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-29 0
139577 What is your opinion on the importance of learning a second... Çö* ¿Ï·á 2024-08-29 1362
139576 In some countries, parents often send their children abroad to... Çö* ¿Ï·á 2024-08-29 1542
139575 The negative side of \" Should public libraries be allowed to... ¼Õ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-29 1066

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04