¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Writing task

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¾È*Çü
2023-05-21 566

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

The concept of divorce impact on people¡¯s thinking. People can drop their marriage easily so couple can dispute and divorce easily. This circumstance increases the rate of the divorce. Some couples divorce even though they have children. Divorce makes children lonely and alienation from the friends. I think divorce should not be occurred.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Robin.
I agree with your opinion. Divorce is too easy nowadays that couples, instead of fighting for their marriage, tend to give up easily.
-T. Caitlyn
The concept of divorce impact on people¡¯s thinking. 
>> The concept of divorce has an impact on people¡¯s thoughts. 
People can drop their marriage easily so couple can dispute and divorce easily. 
>> People can drop their marriage easily so couples can dispute and divorce easily. 
This circumstance increases the rate of the divorce. 
>>  CORRECT
Some couples divorce even though they have children. 
>> CORRECT
Divorce makes children lonely and alienation from the friends. 
>> Divorce makes children lonely and experience alienation from their friends. 
I think divorce should not be occurred.
>> I think divorce should not have occurred.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
126171 Do you like reading? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 0
126170 1. Vacation -Homework °û*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 235
126169 H.W ±Ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 167
126168 If marriage will not be for you in the next 5 years, what should... ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-03-02 3
126167 2023-3/2 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-02 148
126166 Homework ³ª*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-03-02 2
126165 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-02 195
126164 The busy person. ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-03-02 170
126163 Photo makes the world special. ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-02 1
126162 Homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-03-02 144
126161 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-03-02 1
126160 Gramma ÃÖ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-02 1
126159 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-03-02 7
126158 homework 03.02 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-03-02 142
126157 Is physical health more important than mental health? ÀÌ*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-03-02 3
126156 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-02 149
126155 homework ½Å*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-03-02 0
126154 unicorn ¹Ú*¶÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-02 139
126153 Mobile phone ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-02 1
126152 My nighttime routine! ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-03-02 163

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04