¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2023-05-18 629

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Hey, T.Donna.
Now I am a little drunken.
I had a meeting with a pharmacist who is going to join our building.
Her husband is also pharmacist, and I met both of them today.
They are so friendly and humble.
As I told them about many things, they focused to my words.
Also, they seemed to know how to make others feel good.
We enjoyed a sumptious dinner in the luxurious japanese restaurant.
I am sure that she is going to run her drugstore very well.
Dr. MJ didn't join this meeting, so I reported them to him.
Dr.MJ also was satisfied with their polite attitude.
They even gave me a present; gift card.
Anyway, today was a good day for me.
Our previous house became having other owner.
Thus, I've got my guarrantee money from the owner.
I could pay some of my debt with that money.
And, it made me feel happier.
For me, money means freedom.
If I am free from the debt, I will be happier than now.
It's almost midnight.
I should take a shower and go to sleep now.
See you soon.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good morning, Dr. Kim!

Meeting the pharmacists who are also a couple is heaven sent. Two months ago when you just transferred in your new clinic, this was one of the things that you pointed out as a challenge since procuring medicine is not easy. Finally, after a couple of months, here they are. As you have described them as kind and good businessmen, I guess you are truly lucky to be in one building. I wish you both the best in you own businesses.

I hope that there will be more tenants occupying this building that will assist you in your clinic.

I strongly agree that money emancipates us from our worries of finacial constraints. After all, we all work so hard because of it. Hence, having money can set us free from the bondage of tasks. So, we have to learn not to be slaves of money by knowing how to compound and invest it wisely.

Go over my grammar suggestions. The frequency of your correct sentences is so high always. You did a great job! 

See you next week!

-T. Donna~

Hey, T.Donna.
>> Correct!

Now I am a little drunken.
>> Now I am a little drunk.

I had a meeting with a pharmacist who is going to join our building.
>> Correct!

Her husband is also pharmacist, and I met both of them today.
>> Her husband is also a pharmacist, and I met both of them today.

They are so friendly and humble.
>> Correct!

As I told them about many things, they focused to my words.
>> Correct!

Also, they seemed to know how to make others feel good.
>> Correct!

We enjoyed a sumptious dinner in the luxurious japanese restaurant.
>> Corect!
Or: We enjoyed a sumptious dinner in the luxurious Japanese restaurant.

I am sure that she is going to run her drugstore very well.
>> Correct!

Dr. MJ didn't join this meeting, so I reported them to him.
>> Correct!

Dr.MJ also was satisfied with their polite attitude.
>> Correct!

They even gave me a present; gift card.
>> Correct!
Or: They even gave me a present: a gift card.

Anyway, today was a good day for me.
>> Correct!

Our previous house became having other owner.
>> Our previous house has another owner.

Thus, I've got my guarrantee money from the owner.
>>Thus, I got my guarrantee money from the owner.  

I could pay some of my debt with that money.
>> Correct!

And, it made me feel happier.
>> Correct!

For me, money means freedom.
>> Correct!

If I am free from the debt, I will be happier than now.
>> If I am free from debt, I will be happier than now.

It's almost midnight.
>> Correct!

I should take a shower and go to sleep now.
>> Correct!

See you soon.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
129507 WRITING TASK: What are your ways to study more effectively? ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 2
129506 What are you really good at doing? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 2403
129505 How can daily life support services positively impact the... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 2329
129504 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 1530
129503 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 1022
129502 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 0
129501 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 945
129500 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 0
129499 HOMEWORK FOR 06/23 How important is it to wear a facemask when... ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 6
129498 Diary ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 0
129497 What crimes do you think will increase in the future? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 0
129496 trend ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 1
129495 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 0
129494 meet the new person. ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 1967
129493 What Korean food would you like recommend and why? ÀÌ*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 1548
129492 How would you describe a perfect weekend? ÀÌ*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 2643
129491 homework Àå*¼® ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 2023
129490 The biggest choice in my life! ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 1203
129489 Home work ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 1595
129488 homework 07.13 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 1392

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04