¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2023-05-17 911

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Hello.
There was a something special today.
Dr.MJ ordered some kind of electric small car for us before, and that present was arrived at home this afternoon.
That car's name is "D.Throne S".
Maybe you can google it.
I think that the car is the symbol of wealth.
It is too expensive; more than four thousands dollars.
That car can allow three people including two adults.
After my work, I came home as fast as I can.
And, I drive the car with my daughters; Irene and Rachel.
It made me happy.
During the driving, I could feel the fresh air.
Of course, my wife was so satisfied with that, too.
She told her friends about it.
Maybe, after several years, my daughters can't use the car.
However, we are going to have a good time for many years.
As for my assignment, I actually don't know my mind exactly.
Sometimes, I was sick of my work, but at times, I enjoyed working.
For now, six hours a day is affordable for me, I guess.
I am sure that Dr.MJ and you won't be satisfied with that time.
See you.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello there, Dr. Kim!

What a beautiful day for you and your family! After all, there is one costly thing that leveled up your happiness- the D. Throne S car! I am sure that you and your daughters had a fantastic time riding your new car. Wait, does Irene and Rachel have driver's license? ^^ Nevertheless, this shall be their first car ever and they have to be responsible drivers in the park. Meanwhilel, truly, I agree that this toy car is for the children of the wealthy like you and Dr. MJ.

If you are tired and feel blue, you can always bring this car outside and have fun with your daghters. Maybe, you can take photos and snap those good memories.

Meanwhile, those who generally genuinely enjoy work are more productive, happier, and more successful. According to reserch, if you want to achieve the perfect blend of productivity, happiness, and time affluence, a more realistic goal is to work slightly below 40 hours per week. The research shows that even shaving an hour or two off of the standard 40-hour workweek can have huge benefits, both at work and at home. This means an everage of eight hours or less would be great. As you said, six hours of work may work the best for you. Nonetheless, it is achievable someday when you can find another doctor to join your team, or when you are almost onwards retirement.

Many of your sentences are correct, well done! Pleae study some of my grammar suggestions as usual. I am s grateful for all of your effort.

See you then!

-T. Donna~

Hello.
>> Correct!

There was a something special today.
>> There was something special today.

Dr.MJ ordered some kind of electric small car for us before, and that present was arrived at home this afternoon.
>> Dr.MJ ordered some kind of electric small car for us before, and that present arrived at home this afternoon.

That car's name is "D.Throne S".
>> Correct!

Maybe you can google it.
>> Correct!
Or: Google 

I think that the car is the symbol of wealth.
>> Correct!

It is too expensive; more than four thousands dollars.
>> Correct!

That car can allow three people including two adults.
>> Correct!

After my work, I came home as fast as I can.
>> Correct!

And, I drive the car with my daughters; Irene and Rachel.
>>  And, I drove the car with my daughters Irene and Rachel.

It made me happy.
>> Correct!

During the driving, I could feel the fresh air.
>> During the drive, I can feel the fresh air.

Of course, my wife was so satisfied with that, too.
>> Correct!

She told her friends about it.
>> Correct!

Maybe, after several years, my daughters can't use the car.
>> Correct!

However, we are going to have a good time for many years.
>> Correct!

As for my assignment, I actually don't know my mind exactly.
>> Correct!

Sometimes, I was sick of my work, but at times, I enjoyed working.
>> Sometimes, I was sick of my work, but at times, I enjoy working.

For now, six hours a day is affordable for me, I guess.
>> Correct!

I am sure that Dr.MJ and you won't be satisfied with that time.
>> Correct!

See you.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
125690 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-02-16 265
125689 2023-2/15 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-15 1844
125688 What do you do when you have trouble sleeping? ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-02-15 520
125687 We have to practice how to read efficiently ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-02-15 0
125686 homework 02.15 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-02-15 403
125685 What\'s your thought on the death penalty as punishment for a... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-02-15 2
125684 Peer pressure is just a fact of life. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-02-15 551
125683 HOMEWORK È«*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-02-15 5
125682 homework. ½Å*ÈÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-15 660
125681 homework ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-15 689
125680 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-15 1356
125679 homework ½Å*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-02-15 3
125678 letter ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-15 3
125677 Why are long-term goals important? ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-02-15 668
125676 memory ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-15 1
125675 Exam stress affects me¡¦ ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-02-15 600
125674 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-02-15 2
125673 Should arrests be made of the builders of the apartments... ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-02-15 4
125672 homework ä*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-15 286
125671 What is special about eating with another person? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-15 588

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04