¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2023-05-17 342

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Hello.
There was a something special today.
Dr.MJ ordered some kind of electric small car for us before, and that present was arrived at home this afternoon.
That car's name is "D.Throne S".
Maybe you can google it.
I think that the car is the symbol of wealth.
It is too expensive; more than four thousands dollars.
That car can allow three people including two adults.
After my work, I came home as fast as I can.
And, I drive the car with my daughters; Irene and Rachel.
It made me happy.
During the driving, I could feel the fresh air.
Of course, my wife was so satisfied with that, too.
She told her friends about it.
Maybe, after several years, my daughters can't use the car.
However, we are going to have a good time for many years.
As for my assignment, I actually don't know my mind exactly.
Sometimes, I was sick of my work, but at times, I enjoyed working.
For now, six hours a day is affordable for me, I guess.
I am sure that Dr.MJ and you won't be satisfied with that time.
See you.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello there, Dr. Kim!

What a beautiful day for you and your family! After all, there is one costly thing that leveled up your happiness- the D. Throne S car! I am sure that you and your daughters had a fantastic time riding your new car. Wait, does Irene and Rachel have driver's license? ^^ Nevertheless, this shall be their first car ever and they have to be responsible drivers in the park. Meanwhilel, truly, I agree that this toy car is for the children of the wealthy like you and Dr. MJ.

If you are tired and feel blue, you can always bring this car outside and have fun with your daghters. Maybe, you can take photos and snap those good memories.

Meanwhile, those who generally genuinely enjoy work are more productive, happier, and more successful. According to reserch, if you want to achieve the perfect blend of productivity, happiness, and time affluence, a more realistic goal is to work slightly below 40 hours per week. The research shows that even shaving an hour or two off of the standard 40-hour workweek can have huge benefits, both at work and at home. This means an everage of eight hours or less would be great. As you said, six hours of work may work the best for you. Nonetheless, it is achievable someday when you can find another doctor to join your team, or when you are almost onwards retirement.

Many of your sentences are correct, well done! Pleae study some of my grammar suggestions as usual. I am s grateful for all of your effort.

See you then!

-T. Donna~

Hello.
>> Correct!

There was a something special today.
>> There was something special today.

Dr.MJ ordered some kind of electric small car for us before, and that present was arrived at home this afternoon.
>> Dr.MJ ordered some kind of electric small car for us before, and that present arrived at home this afternoon.

That car's name is "D.Throne S".
>> Correct!

Maybe you can google it.
>> Correct!
Or: Google 

I think that the car is the symbol of wealth.
>> Correct!

It is too expensive; more than four thousands dollars.
>> Correct!

That car can allow three people including two adults.
>> Correct!

After my work, I came home as fast as I can.
>> Correct!

And, I drive the car with my daughters; Irene and Rachel.
>>  And, I drove the car with my daughters Irene and Rachel.

It made me happy.
>> Correct!

During the driving, I could feel the fresh air.
>> During the drive, I can feel the fresh air.

Of course, my wife was so satisfied with that, too.
>> Correct!

She told her friends about it.
>> Correct!

Maybe, after several years, my daughters can't use the car.
>> Correct!

However, we are going to have a good time for many years.
>> Correct!

As for my assignment, I actually don't know my mind exactly.
>> Correct!

Sometimes, I was sick of my work, but at times, I enjoyed working.
>> Sometimes, I was sick of my work, but at times, I enjoy working.

For now, six hours a day is affordable for me, I guess.
>> Correct!

I am sure that Dr.MJ and you won't be satisfied with that time.
>> Correct!

See you.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
129305 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-05 0
129304 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-05 0
129303 HOMEWORK FOR 05/12 Á¶*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-05 1
129302 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-05 1630
129301 The advantages of using public transport ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-05 1265
129300 Watching movies at home ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-05 1980
129299 HOMEWORK FOR 05/10 Á¶*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-05 1
129298 DIRECTIONS: Find the synonyms of the words below and use them in... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-07-05 1
129297 Homework ¼Û*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-05 1510
129296 sleeping disorder ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-05 2
129295 What did you learn from the fairytale \"Jack and the Beanstalk\"? Á¶*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-05 1520
129294 What word of advice do you have for your son so that he can be... ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-05 1114
129293 Do you have any exercise or fitness goals that you¡¯d like to... ¹Ý* ¿Ï·á 2023-07-05 1795
129292 deny and appeal ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-05 898
129291 7/5 °í*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-07-05 2
129290 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-05 1
129289 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-05 1238
129288 Can you correct my sentence? ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-05 2
129287 Trust Á¶*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-05 2717
129286 Does your hobby interfere with your work/study/personal life?... ¾È*½Ò ¿Ï·á 2023-07-04 1880

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04