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영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
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담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
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Homework

작성자: 김*우
2023-05-16 782

회원님의 영작문

Hello.
Since I drank a whiskey too much last night, I was worried about my condition.
However, my condition was good and I didn't feel emptiness all day.
Whiskey still worked well as a treatment for me.
There was a patient who is now 4 years old and he had a laceration on forehead.
I did a wound repair, but it took about 30 minutes.
During the operation, many patients and clients were waiting.
I should not have done that.
Actually, Dr.MJ told me many times that he wanted me not to repair of children's laceration, because it is time-consuming and it makes our staff exausted.
I forget it though.
There are many ER center nearby, so I don't need to treat all traumatic patient.
One more staff will resign after today's work.
One of our manager has a bad attitude to other staff, but she is good at work, and I can see her to grow up so fast.
She is one of our problem that we face.
I don't know what to do.
I prefer to live a happy life.
However, I need a stable life to acomplish that.
See you.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Good day, Dr. Kim!

You seemed pretty fine in class today after yesterday's whiskey effect. There is enough whisky in the world to consume. Cheers to more relax and comfortable times!

I admire your call of duty to stitch the wound of the poor boy yesterday. It was the right thing to do. It took time but as a doctor, you had the responsibility to ease the pain of that boy. I am proud of you! Beauty can wait but a poor little boy in pain cannot.

Here comes your staff issues once again. Women really fight for their positions and assert themselves too much nowadays. This results to conflicts and misunderstanding. I hope you can manage them well so some departure will be solved. Meanwhile, Dr. MJ will take care of these aspects. When he speaks, some of them leave. It is the survival of the fittest.

Finally a stable and happy life is what we all want. While happiness is an ephemeral feeling, stability and consistency help us achieve the state of happiness. Thus, we exert effort in attaining these in life.

Your constant effort and hard work in making your homework is highly appreciated. Visit my suggestions and ask them in class when you can.

Have a beautiful afternoon!

-T. Donna~ 

Hello.
>> Correct!

Since I drank a whiskey too much last night, I was worried about my condition.
>> Since I drank  too much whiskey last night, I was worried about my condition.

However, my condition was good and I didn't feel emptiness all day.
>> Correct!

Whiskey still worked well as a treatment for me.
>> Correct!

There was a patient who is now 4 years old and he had a laceration on forehead.
>> There was a patient who is now 4 years old and he had a laceration on his forehead.

I did a wound repair, but it took about 30 minutes.
>> Correct!

During the operation, many patients and clients were waiting.
>> Correct!

I should not have done that.
>> Correct!

Actually, Dr.MJ told me many times that he wanted me not to repair of children's laceration, because it is time-consuming and it makes our staff exausted.
>> Actually, Dr.MJ told me many times that he wanted me not to repair children's laceration, because it is time-consuming and it makes our staff exausted.

I forget it though.
>> Correct!

There are many ER center nearby, so I don't need to treat all traumatic patient.
>> There are many ER centers nearby, so I don't need to treat all traumatic patient.

One more staff will resign after today's work.
>> Correct!

One of our manager has a bad attitude to other staff, but she is good at work, and I can see her to grow up so fast.
>> One of our managers has a bad attitude to the other staff, but she is good at work, and I can see her grow so fast.

She is one of our problem that we face.
>> She is one of our problems that we face.

I don't know what to do.
>> Correct!

I prefer to live a happy life.
>> Correct!

However, I need a stable life to acomplish that.
>> Correct!

See you.
>> Correct!
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