¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

I think they are not good polices.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: À±*Çý
2023-05-15 1716

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think police is a noble job.
They fight crime for others, but they get paid less.
So I respect the police.
But the cops I've met disappoint me.
They have high professional pride, but they run away when people ask for help, and there are entertainment establishments and police involved in crimes.
And their actions don't help.
This is because they know that they need a polite attitude when they ask for help.
But they are always rude.
That's why I feel uncomfortable facing the police and reluctan.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Da Hye,

Great job on completing your homework! Your response discussing the noble nature of police work and sharing your observations about their actions demonstrates critical thinking and thoughtful analysis. Your thoughts and insights are valuable. By providing specific examples or anecdotes, you can further support your observations about police officers. Additionally, working on expanding your vocabulary and using synonyms will help to avoid repetitive language. For example, you could replace "disappoint" with "let down" and "reluctant" with "hesitant." I want to commend you on expressing your ideas and concerns about the police. It takes courage to share your thoughts openly. As you continue to practice your writing skills, your ability to express your viewpoints will become even stronger. Remember, writing is a journey, and every step you take brings you closer to becoming an excellent writer in English. Keep up the great work. With dedication and perseverance, you will continue to improve and excel in English writing.

~Teacher Cathy

 

I think police is a noble job.

>>CORRECT

OR>>I think being a police officer is a noble profession.
They fight crime for others, but they get paid less.

>>CORRECT

OR>>They work to fight crime and protect others, despite being paid less compared to some other professions.
So I respect the police.

>>CORRECT

OR>>Therefore, I have a great deal of respect for the police.
But the cops I've met disappoint me.

>>CORRECT

OR>>However, the encounters I have had with police officers have left me disappointed.
They have high professional pride, but they run away when people ask for help, and there are entertainment establishments and police involved in crimes.

>>CORRECT

OR>>While they possess a strong sense of professional pride, they tend to avoid helping people when asked, and there are cases where police officers are involved in crimes or connected to entertainment establishments.
And their actions don't help.

>>CORRECT

OR>>Their actions do not inspire confidence or provide the assistance that is needed.
This is because they know that they need a polite attitude when they ask for help. But they are always rude.

>>This could be due to their understanding that a polite attitude is necessary when seeking help, yet they consistently display rudeness.
That's why I feel uncomfortable facing the police and reluctan.

>> As a result, I often feel uncomfortable and hesitant when interacting with the police.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
120838 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-18 532
120837 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-18 2
120836 Homework ±è*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-18 501
120835 07.18.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-18 3
120834 Is it more fun to exercise alone or with other people? ¹Ú*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-18 923
120833 Was it hard to live in Australia during your first year? ÀÓ*¶û ¿Ï·á 2022-07-18 2
120832 even ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-18 524
120831 Q È«*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-18 3
120830 What would life be like without weekends? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-18 2
120829 The Internet Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-18 1
120828 Health ³ë*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-18 497
120827 Do you like visiting the library? / Where is your favorite place... ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-07-18 1
120826 Which city has the most delicious food in your country? ¹Ú*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-18 461
120825 Does social media improve people¡¯s communication skills? Why or... ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2022-07-18 0
120824 What have you learned from past failures? Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2022-07-18 1156
120823 Tell me what you do in your part-time job. ¼­*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-17 1032
120822 What is the best present you have ever received? ±è*°â ¿Ï·á 2022-07-17 941
120821 07.15.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-17 1
120820 What do you think is the most dangerous animal? ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-17 599
120819 What facts my school have. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-07-17 539

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04