¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

I think they are not good polices.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: À±*Çý
2023-05-15 1601

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think police is a noble job.
They fight crime for others, but they get paid less.
So I respect the police.
But the cops I've met disappoint me.
They have high professional pride, but they run away when people ask for help, and there are entertainment establishments and police involved in crimes.
And their actions don't help.
This is because they know that they need a polite attitude when they ask for help.
But they are always rude.
That's why I feel uncomfortable facing the police and reluctan.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Da Hye,

Great job on completing your homework! Your response discussing the noble nature of police work and sharing your observations about their actions demonstrates critical thinking and thoughtful analysis. Your thoughts and insights are valuable. By providing specific examples or anecdotes, you can further support your observations about police officers. Additionally, working on expanding your vocabulary and using synonyms will help to avoid repetitive language. For example, you could replace "disappoint" with "let down" and "reluctant" with "hesitant." I want to commend you on expressing your ideas and concerns about the police. It takes courage to share your thoughts openly. As you continue to practice your writing skills, your ability to express your viewpoints will become even stronger. Remember, writing is a journey, and every step you take brings you closer to becoming an excellent writer in English. Keep up the great work. With dedication and perseverance, you will continue to improve and excel in English writing.

~Teacher Cathy

 

I think police is a noble job.

>>CORRECT

OR>>I think being a police officer is a noble profession.
They fight crime for others, but they get paid less.

>>CORRECT

OR>>They work to fight crime and protect others, despite being paid less compared to some other professions.
So I respect the police.

>>CORRECT

OR>>Therefore, I have a great deal of respect for the police.
But the cops I've met disappoint me.

>>CORRECT

OR>>However, the encounters I have had with police officers have left me disappointed.
They have high professional pride, but they run away when people ask for help, and there are entertainment establishments and police involved in crimes.

>>CORRECT

OR>>While they possess a strong sense of professional pride, they tend to avoid helping people when asked, and there are cases where police officers are involved in crimes or connected to entertainment establishments.
And their actions don't help.

>>CORRECT

OR>>Their actions do not inspire confidence or provide the assistance that is needed.
This is because they know that they need a polite attitude when they ask for help. But they are always rude.

>>This could be due to their understanding that a polite attitude is necessary when seeking help, yet they consistently display rudeness.
That's why I feel uncomfortable facing the police and reluctan.

>> As a result, I often feel uncomfortable and hesitant when interacting with the police.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
121831 homework ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-08-24 0
121830 day care centers ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-24 906
121829 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-24 666
121828 Which day of the year are you more likely to spend in your family ¹Ú*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-24 951
121827 Which school subjects do you think are not very popular? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-24 4
121826 > Do you agree with banning gun ownership in the US? Why? ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-24 2
121825 How technology has changed in your lifetime ÀÌ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-23 2
121824 8/23 homework À±*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-08-23 1212
121823 8/23 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-23 817
121822 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-23 477
121821 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-23 2
121820 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-23 1139
121819 How can we develop good habits? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-23 879
121818 If you could only wear one color for the rest of your life, what... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-23 858
121817 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-23 953
121816 What do you do to relax after working hard or experiencing other... Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2022-08-23 581
121815 If you could ask your favorite Disney princess a question, what... Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2022-08-23 844
121814 What would life be like without your computer? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-23 646
121813 If a natural disaster hit your town, what would you do? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-23 1439
121812 Have you ever had the experience of being a leader? What did you... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-08-23 1088

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04