¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2023-05-03 551

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Good evening.
I came home just before.
After the close of our clinic, we had a meeting with the CEO who has a new technological device for nail disorder.
It was very simple, as we expected, however it seemed to be useful.
We decided to introduce this new device next week, so we are going to be busier soon.
During lunch time, I educated our staff about treatments which can be guarranted from the private insurance companies.
It is bothersome, but also helpful for our profit, so we will strenthen those treatements.
Furthermore, I taught a new staff who will be a counselling manager this afternoon as I worked.
She was so active, so I expected her to learn about our clinic fast.
I will teach her again tomorrow.
As the salary day is coming, I am busy organizing and calculating.
Meanwhile, my last daughter has a fever, so I am so worried about it.
We are looking for a doctor who can follow our clinic's rule.
He or she doesn't need to work hard, just need to be diligent.
See you tomorrow.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there, Dr. Kim!

I came across your composition last night when I went to bed and cannot catch my sleep quickly. It can be hard to sleep during summer time.Well, your new nail device is very interesting. Thanks to your intensive and very convincing explanation about it in class. Now, nail fungi will be cured and look like most ordinary nails.

Training your staff had been your constant job. Training has a direct impact on your organization's productivity and performance. As mentioned earlier, training gives employees a better understanding of their responsibilities and the knowledge and skills they need to do that job. This will improve their confidence which can positively impact performance. Most af all, if they will stay long enough to serve you, that would be a great thing. Finding another doctoras well will be an advantage to your efficiency. So, keep looking for one.

Finally, I hope that your last baby will be okay today. Regarding your composition, there are some suggestions about word order, diction, and subject-verb agreement. Please do not fail to read them all below.

See you again next week!

-T. Donna~

Good evening.
>> Correct!

I came home just before.
>> I came home just a few mintes ago.
>> I just came back home.

After the close of our clinic, we had a meeting with the CEO who has a new technological device for nail disorder.
>> After the closing of our clinic, we had a meeting with the CEO who has a new technological device for nail disorders.

It was very simple, as we expected, however it seemed to be useful.
>> Correct!

We decided to introduce this new device next week, so we are going to be busier soon.
>> Correct!

During lunch time, I educated our staff about treatments which can be guarranted from the private insurance companies.
>> Correct!

It is bothersome, but also helpful for our profit, so we will strenthen those treatements.
>> Correct!

Furthermore, I taught a new staff who will be a counselling manager this afternoon as I worked.
>> Correct!

She was so active, so I expected her to learn about our clinic fast.
>> Correct!

I will teach her again tomorrow.
>> Correct!

As the salary day is coming, I am busy organizing and calculating.
>> Correct!

Meanwhile, my last daughter has a fever, so I am so worried about it.
>> Correct!

We are looking for a doctor who can follow our clinic's rule.
>> Correct!
Or: rules

He or she doesn't need to work hard, just need to be diligent.
>> He or she doesn't need to work hard, he just needs to be diligent.

See you tomorrow.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
130308 What are some measures that we can do to reduce our carbon... Á¤*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-18 2540
130307 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-18 2358
130306 What is your own definition of school discipline and behavior... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-08-18 3
130305 homework 08.18 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-08-18 1772
130304 How would your friends describe you? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-18 1645
130303 What do you think is the best place to travel to? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-08-18 1443
130302 My favorite part about school ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-18 1981
130301 Is it too late to solve climate change? ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-18 1640
130300 homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-18 1202
130299 When do you worry a lot? ±¸*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-18 0
130298 Impulsive shopping experience ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-08-18 1787
130297 Do you respect people who can drink a lot? Why or why not? º¹*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-18 1
130296 Which do you think is more important, modern dance or... °­*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-18 2308
130295 WRITING TASK: What do you think is the most valuable thing in... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-08-18 5
130294 Homework ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-18 2439
130293 Homework JA*UNG CHUNG ¿Ï·á 2023-08-18 1625
130292 What do you enjoy most about water parks? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-18 0
130291 What do you include in your ideal fitness program? ÀÌ*¾ç ¿Ï·á 2023-08-18 2786
130290 homwork ¹Ú*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-18 1758
130289 If given the chance, what policies in Korea do you wish to... Á¤*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-18 2134

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04