¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What do you think is the common cause of obesity?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Á¶*ÀÎ
2023-05-02 615

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think psychological problems are the most common cause of obesity.
The stress from loneliness, lack, pressure release anti-stress hormones. That kinds of hormones cause overeating. A few times of overeating makes people more stressful, which in turns creates a cycle that leads to overeating. For example, just before my period, I can not stop to eat food which are salty, hot and sweet even I don't like sweet tasty normally. After I eat all of I want to eat, I felt guilty and get a lot of stress. Those stress make me become lethargic. So, I don't go out of my bed. I do just lie down on my bed and kill the time.

Also, unnecessary intake is another reason. Adult body doesn't need much as young children they don't spend energy to grow up. And people's activity decreases with age. However, many people eat the same amount of food as they did in their teens and twenties.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Thank you for your homework, Jessica!

Practice is always the key!

-Hanna ^^

I think psychological problems are the most common cause of obesity.

>>Correct
The stress from loneliness, lack, pressure release anti-stress hormones. 

>>The stress from loneliness, lack and pressure releases anti-stress hormones.

That kinds of hormones cause overeating. 

>>Those kinds of hormones cause overreacting.

A few times of overeating makes people more stressful, which in turns creates a cycle that leads to overeating.

>>A few times of overreacting makes people more stressful which creates a cycle that leads to overreacting.

 For example, just before my period, I can not stop to eat food which are salty, hot and sweet even I don't like sweet tasty normally. 

>>For example, just before my period, I can't stop eating food which are salty, hot and sweet even if I don't normally like sweet food.

After I eat all of I want to eat, I felt guilty and get a lot of stress.

>>After eating all the food that I want to eat, I felt guilty and I was stressed.

Those stress make me become lethargic. 

>>Correct

So, I don't go out of my bed. 

>>So, I don't get up from my bed.

I do just lie down on my bed and kill the time.

>>I just lie down on my bed and kill the time.

Also, unnecessary intake is another reason. 

>>Correct.

Adult body doesn't need much as young children they don't spend energy to grow up. 

>>Adult body doesn't need as much as young children's body to have more energy growing up.

And people's activity decreases with age. 

>>Correct.

However, many people eat the same amount of food as they did in their teens and twenties.

>>Correct

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
128688 What questions would you like to ask the fraud expert? ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-06-06 4
128687 The fruit that I dislike ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-06 725
128686 What is your favorite day and why? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-06-06 624
128685 What I did do today ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-06-06 1395
128684 What is the implication of having an aging population ¹®*¿í ¿Ï·á 2023-06-06 1096
128683 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-06 605
128682 Horror movie¡¦ ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-06-06 947
128681 Should Sex education be mandatory in high schools? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-06-06 1215
128680 Do you want to learn languages? Which language? ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-06-06 1
128679 homework ½Å*ÈÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-06 579
128678 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-06 1
128677 06-02 home work ±è*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-06 1
128676 My character ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-06 2
128675 6/6 homework ÃÖ*º½ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-06 959
128674 Homework ÀÌ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-06-06 477
128673 The importantance of greeting ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-05 770
128672 Myhomework Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-06-05 876
128671 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-05 1014
128670 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-05 820
128669 homework 06.05 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-06-05 708

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04