¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2023-04-27 690

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Hi.
It's almost midnight.
As you know, Dr. MJ and I ate Sam-gyup-sal for dinner.
As we ate the food, I asked Dr.MJ whether he is happy or not.
He told me that he is the most happy now than ever.
Since I told him about the argument between my wife and me, he explained me about his divorce in details.
After his mother passed away around three years ago, he thought of his and wife's lives well.
They had different hobby, life style, and even food preference.
Also, they always wanted different thing, and they had no empathy.
For their own happiness, they decided to divorce two years ago.
One interesting thing is that they live in same house until now.
Anyway, they never touch other's life, and they are happy.
After dinner, I called one of my friend who is also doctor on my way home.
He is going through a hard time, because of dissapointment to his wife.
He told me that his wife has been changed.
One clear thing is that our own happiness is as important as our families.
See you tomorrow.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good morning, Dr. Kim!

You stayed up late last night to write this homework. Thank you. As you have hearty meals with Dr. MJ, the best strategy or a simple way for him to open up seems like sharing your own story first to calm him and open up about his. I find this very therapeutic since you are the first person in his 'care' list. I am sure that you play a big role in his happiness as you are partners in building your business. 

In reality, we want simple things in life. However, the simple things are the hardest to achieve. We sometimes do little things that can make our family unhappy. Despite all the problems, if we want to stay in a relationship, we must be willing to be a better person and conquer our pride most of the time. Of course, these things are better said than done. It sounds simple but very difficult tp apply. We cannot judge people who get divorce and compare them with our families since every family is unique. We will never truly understand their situation, in fact. We just have to listen and pick a lesson or two, hoping that things will be better in our own marriage or life status.

For many, their family is their happiness. But, what if the source of your stress is your family?  Then, your other doctor friends may start looking outside the circle of their family- material things, other relationships, among others. At the end of the day, we are all human beings who just want to be cared for and loved. No amount of material things compare to genuine and strong relationships we built overtime. 

I am grateful to understand your observations and analysis in your daily life through your writing. You present your story with much clarity, empathy, and style. You mastered a very manageable structure of the beginning, body, and conclusion. With these, execellent expositions this week. Keep writing!

Have a happy weekend!

-T. Donna~

Hi.
>> Correct!

It's almost midnight.
>> Correct!

As you know, Dr. MJ and I ate Sam-gyup-sal for dinner.
>> Correct!

As we ate the food, I asked Dr.MJ whether he is happy or not.
>> Correct!

He told me that he is the most happy now than ever.
>> Correct!

Since I told him about the argument between my wife and me, he explained me about his divorce in details.
>> Correct!

After his mother passed away around three years ago, he thought of his and wife's lives well.
>> Correct!

They had different hobby, life style, and even food preference.
>> Correct!

Also, they always wanted different thing, and they had no empathy.
>> Also, they always wanted different things, and they had no empathy.

For their own happiness, they decided to divorce two years ago.
>> Correct!

One interesting thing is that they live in same house until now.
>> One interesting thing is that they live in the same house until now.

Anyway, they never touch other's life, and they are happy.
>> Anyway, they never touch each other's life, and they are happy.

After dinner, I called one of my friend who is also doctor on my way home.
>> After dinner, I called one of my friends who is also doctor on my way home.

He is going through a hard time, because of dissapointment to his wife.
>> Correct!

He told me that his wife has been changed.
>> He told me that his wife has changed.

One clear thing is that our own happiness is as important as our families.
>> Correct!

See you tomorrow.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
123276 Free essay À±*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-29 4
123275 sensitive ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-28 1451
123274 Women are more emotional than men. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-10-28 1599
123273 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-28 0
123272 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-28 0
123271 Homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-28 1443
123270 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-28 0
123269 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-10-28 2
123268 Homework ¼Û*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-10-28 1794
123267 How\'s the weather today? Is it normal for this time of year? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-28 1968
123266 Can people change their personality if they want to? Do you know... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-28 2291
123265 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-10-28 0
123264 Use these words in sentences ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-10-28 2758
123263 They are allergic to the 21st century. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-10-28 1972
123262 What are some topics that you can\'t stand to talk about? Why? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-28 1394
123261 Friday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-28 1585
123260 WRITING TASK: How do you carry out your busy day? ¾È*Çå ¿Ï·á 2022-10-28 1883
123259 we must ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-28 3382
123258 woman suffrage ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-28 1317
123257 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-28 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04