¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2023-04-27 897

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Hi.
It's almost midnight.
As you know, Dr. MJ and I ate Sam-gyup-sal for dinner.
As we ate the food, I asked Dr.MJ whether he is happy or not.
He told me that he is the most happy now than ever.
Since I told him about the argument between my wife and me, he explained me about his divorce in details.
After his mother passed away around three years ago, he thought of his and wife's lives well.
They had different hobby, life style, and even food preference.
Also, they always wanted different thing, and they had no empathy.
For their own happiness, they decided to divorce two years ago.
One interesting thing is that they live in same house until now.
Anyway, they never touch other's life, and they are happy.
After dinner, I called one of my friend who is also doctor on my way home.
He is going through a hard time, because of dissapointment to his wife.
He told me that his wife has been changed.
One clear thing is that our own happiness is as important as our families.
See you tomorrow.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good morning, Dr. Kim!

You stayed up late last night to write this homework. Thank you. As you have hearty meals with Dr. MJ, the best strategy or a simple way for him to open up seems like sharing your own story first to calm him and open up about his. I find this very therapeutic since you are the first person in his 'care' list. I am sure that you play a big role in his happiness as you are partners in building your business. 

In reality, we want simple things in life. However, the simple things are the hardest to achieve. We sometimes do little things that can make our family unhappy. Despite all the problems, if we want to stay in a relationship, we must be willing to be a better person and conquer our pride most of the time. Of course, these things are better said than done. It sounds simple but very difficult tp apply. We cannot judge people who get divorce and compare them with our families since every family is unique. We will never truly understand their situation, in fact. We just have to listen and pick a lesson or two, hoping that things will be better in our own marriage or life status.

For many, their family is their happiness. But, what if the source of your stress is your family?  Then, your other doctor friends may start looking outside the circle of their family- material things, other relationships, among others. At the end of the day, we are all human beings who just want to be cared for and loved. No amount of material things compare to genuine and strong relationships we built overtime. 

I am grateful to understand your observations and analysis in your daily life through your writing. You present your story with much clarity, empathy, and style. You mastered a very manageable structure of the beginning, body, and conclusion. With these, execellent expositions this week. Keep writing!

Have a happy weekend!

-T. Donna~

Hi.
>> Correct!

It's almost midnight.
>> Correct!

As you know, Dr. MJ and I ate Sam-gyup-sal for dinner.
>> Correct!

As we ate the food, I asked Dr.MJ whether he is happy or not.
>> Correct!

He told me that he is the most happy now than ever.
>> Correct!

Since I told him about the argument between my wife and me, he explained me about his divorce in details.
>> Correct!

After his mother passed away around three years ago, he thought of his and wife's lives well.
>> Correct!

They had different hobby, life style, and even food preference.
>> Correct!

Also, they always wanted different thing, and they had no empathy.
>> Also, they always wanted different things, and they had no empathy.

For their own happiness, they decided to divorce two years ago.
>> Correct!

One interesting thing is that they live in same house until now.
>> One interesting thing is that they live in the same house until now.

Anyway, they never touch other's life, and they are happy.
>> Anyway, they never touch each other's life, and they are happy.

After dinner, I called one of my friend who is also doctor on my way home.
>> After dinner, I called one of my friends who is also doctor on my way home.

He is going through a hard time, because of dissapointment to his wife.
>> Correct!

He told me that his wife has been changed.
>> He told me that his wife has changed.

One clear thing is that our own happiness is as important as our families.
>> Correct!

See you tomorrow.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
120457 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 599
120456 Homework for 07.05.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 3
120455 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 2883
120454 Are older people actually wiser? ±è*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 716
120453 My favorite day ÀÌ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 1337
120452 My biggest challenge this year ÀÌ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 2421
120451 culture that i want to bring back to South Korea ÀÌ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 858
120450 What is a food that people think is healthy but really isn¡¯t?... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 462
120449 mistake that I don\'t want to make again ÀÌ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 508
120448 If you can change something about yourself, what would it be and... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 551
120447 What culture in South Korea would you want to bring back? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 516
120446 In your opinion, is abortion safe? Why or why not? ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 1
120445 Tuesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 575
120444 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 1
120443 If your company asked you to work on a holiday like Cuuseok or... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 1
120442 Do you celebrate the things you do have? ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 3
120441 About parenting ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 2
120440 What is your opinion about abortion? Should it continue to be... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 521
120439 Hi Gemmar ÀÌ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 461
120438 The homework about the definitions of the words ¾È*Çå ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 559

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04