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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Have you ever experienced being a victim of a phishing attack? If so, how did you deal with it? Who

작성자: 황*하
2023-04-23 1246

회원님의 영작문

It has been almost 10 years since I had an experience of phishing scam. I came to Korea to celebrate my father's 70 years birthday when I worked in the UAE. My wife asked me to bring many home supplies from Korea that can't find in the UAE. She ordered various items via internet shopping mall in the other day. I received some items but some didn't arrive at my parents home. I was little bit oppressive because of late shipment. That was when it all began. I received text message from one of the biggest shipping companies. It asked me to click URL, if I wanted to find where my shipment is. So, I tried to put my personal information in the fake website. However, I didn't think it is fake one because its feature was exactly same as original one. Although, I repeated input my information, system didn't show any details about shipment. Suddenly, I got weird message from a anonymous person which is "smile" emoticon. I felt really scary when I realized that somebody took my personal informatio

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Good day, Sir Hwang!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

It has been almost 10 years since I had an experience of phishing scam. 
>> CORRECT!
OR >> It has been almost 10 years since I had been a victim of phishing scam. 
I came to Korea to celebrate my father's 70 years birthday when I worked in the UAE. 
>> I came to Korea to celebrate my father's 70th birthday when I worked in the UAE. 
My wife asked me to bring many home supplies from Korea that can't find in the UAE. 
>> CORRECT!
She ordered various items via internet shopping mall in the other day. 
>> CORRECT!
I received some items but some didn't arrive at my parents home. 
>> CORRECT!
I was little bit oppressive because of late shipment. 
>> I was a little oppressive because of late shipment. 
OR >> I was a bit oppressive because of late shipment. 
That was when it all began. 
>> CORRECT!
I received text message from one of the biggest shipping companies. 
>> I received a text message from one of the biggest shipping companies. 
It asked me to click URL, if I wanted to find where my shipment is. 
>> CORRECT!
So, I tried to put my personal information in the fake website. 
>> CORRECT!
However, I didn't think it is fake one because its feature was exactly same as original one. 
>> However, I didn't think it is fake because its feature was exactly same as the original one. 
Although, I repeated input my information, system didn't show any details about shipment. 
>> Although, I repeatedly input my information, the system didn't show any details about the shipment. 
Suddenly, I got weird message from a anonymous person which is "smile" emoticon. 
>> Suddenly, I got a weird message from an anonymous person which is a "smile" emoticon. 
I felt really scary when I realized that somebody took my personal informatio
>> I felt really scared when I realized that somebody took my personal information.

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첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
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03
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