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question-Advertise your hometown, please

Me-
I was born in busan. it is located in the southeastern part of korea. it takes about 4 hours by car from seoul.
It is a beautiful city by the sea.
Busan people are full of energy.
Busan is also famous for its film festival and the largest department store in the world.
Many tourists love going to resorts and restaurants with beautiful beaches.
If you like to relax while looking at the sea, there are hotels and restaurants that I would like to recommend.

(I'm introducing Busan, but do you think I'm talking about too many advantages?)

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Tia,

You did a good job on your homework. A hometown is a place where you have lived your childhood and youth. It's important to always keep in mind what your hometown has taught you and how you were raised in such a beautiful place. We should write an essay in such a way that the readers are influenced by the article and are interested in visiting your hometown. So, it's okay if you said a lot of positive things about Busan. ^^

~Teacher Cathy

 

question-Advertise your hometown, please
>>Describe your hometown.
Me-

>>Here is my answer.
I was born in busan.

>> I was born in Busan.

it is located in the southeastern part of korea.

>> It is located in the South Eastern part of Korea.

it takes about 4 hours by car from seoul.

>> It takes about 4 hours by car from Seoul.

It is a beautiful city by the sea.

>>CORRECT

Busan people are full of energy.

>>CORRECT

OR>> The people of Busan are full of energy.

Busan is also famous for its film festival and the largest department store in the world.

>>CORRECT
Many tourists love going to resorts and restaurants with beautiful beaches.

>>CORRECT
If you like to relax while looking at the sea, there are hotels and restaurants that I would like to recommend.
>>CORRECT
(I'm introducing Busan, but do you think I'm talking about too many advantages?)

>>CORRECT

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