¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What is the most logical reason for becoming a vegetarian?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Àå*Àº
2023-04-19 794

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I don't know the detail reasons about why people become vegetarians so I searched about it.
There were some reasons. First, vegetarians can have vitamin, mineral ..etc that people can't have enough.
Second, becoming a vegetarian is good for heart and blood vessel.
It's because there are a lot of dietary fiber and there are less cholesterol and saturated fat than general meals.
Next, it is good for diet because vegetables accelerate digestion and metabolism.
And, there are a lot of antioxidant in vegetables and fruits so it makes people healthy.
People also can not be exposed from chemical additives because vegetarians don't eat processed food.
Last, vegetarians can reduce the metan gas and environmental pollution from avoiding meat.
Becoming a vegetarian gives a lot of good things to a person and the environment.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Gem!
Wow this writing was very good. I can see that you did some research. Thank you for your effort. See you tomorrow! ^^
~~Teacher Kate 

I don't know the detail reasons about why people become vegetarians so I searched about it.
>>I don't know, in detail, the reasons about why people become vegetarians so I searched about it.
There were some reasons. 
>>There are some reasons. 
First, vegetarians can have vitamin, mineral ..etc that people can't have enough.
>>First, vegetarians can have the vitamins and minerals that people can't have enough of.
Second, becoming a vegetarian is good for heart and blood vessel.
>>Second, becoming a vegetarian is good for the heart and blood vessels.
It's because there are a lot of dietary fiber and there are less cholesterol and saturated fat than general meals.
>>It's because there are a lot of dietary fiber and there is less cholesterol and saturated fat than general meals.
Next, it is good for diet because vegetables accelerate digestion and metabolism.
>>CORRECT!
And, there are a lot of antioxidant in vegetables and fruits so it makes people healthy.
>>CORRECT!
People also can not be exposed from chemical additives because vegetarians don't eat processed food.
>>Vegetarian are not exposed to chemical additives because they don't eat processed foods. 
Last, vegetarians can reduce the metan gas and environmental pollution from avoiding meat.
>>Last, vegetarians can reduce the methane gas and environmental pollution from avoiding meat.
Becoming a vegetarian gives a lot of good things to a person and the environment.
>>CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
131559 homework ¼Õ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-11 1509
131558 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-11 1905
131557 Letter ±Ç*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-11 1
131556 10.Oct.2023 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-11 1
131555 homework Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-11 6
131554 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-10-11 2660
131553 Do you always try to do things properly, or do you sometimes cut... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-10-11 3
131552 What are the other advantages of living with your extended... Á¶*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-10 1
131551 Do you think egg freezing can solve the low birth rate in Korea?... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-10-10 1
131550 Write about the writing cantest you jpined ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-10 1
131549 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-10-10 0
131548 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-10-10 1
131547 homework 10.10 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-10-10 1587
131546 What makes you smile today? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-10 1570
131545 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-10 1816
131544 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-10-10 0
131543 What are the best and worst things about weddings? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-10-10 1711
131542 HOMEWORK- 231009 ¾ç*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-10 1
131541 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about ¡°My favorite... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-10-10 2
131540 My schedule ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-10-10 1968

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04