¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you agree that a student¡¯s bullying records should reflect in university admissions and job appli

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2023-04-17 698

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

It can be the one of measures to prevent school bullying but I don't think that it is the major solution because there is a research that punishment is not the best way to decrease the crime rate. School bullying has became serious social problem in Korea. We can easily seen news about offenders among famous celebrities. It has disclosured from victims who were violated when they were a teenager. Victims have had hard time due to the nightmare at school and nobody cared of their pain. They were shocked after watching TV or media which were appeared school bullying offenders. It can be second violence for them because they have tried to forget their memory but if they saw successful life of offenders, they would be crazy. As a member of society, I strongly believe that criminals should be punished by the law strongly, but if they are students, I think we have to focus on moral education more than physical and mental punishment.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Sir Hwang!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

It can be the one of measures to prevent school bullying but I don't think that it is the major solution because there is a research that punishment is not the best way to decrease the crime rate. 
>> It can be one of the measures to prevent school bullying but I don't think that it is the major solution because there is a research that punishment is not the best way to decrease the crime rate. 
School bullying has became serious social problem in Korea. 
>> School bullying became a serious social problem in Korea. 
We can easily seen news about offenders among famous celebrities. 
>> We can easily see news about offenders among famous celebrities. 
It has disclosured from victims who were violated when they were a teenager. 
>> It has been disclosed by victims who were violated when they were a teenager. 
Victims have had hard time due to the nightmare at school and nobody cared of their pain. 
>> Victims have had hard time due to the nightmare at school and nobody cared about their pain. 
They were shocked after watching TV or media which were appeared school bullying offenders. 
>> They were shocked after watching TV or media which showed school bullying offenders. 
It can be second violence for them because they have tried to forget their memory but if they saw successful life of offenders, they would be crazy. 
>> CORRECT!
As a member of society, I strongly believe that criminals should be punished by the law strongly, but if they are students, I think we have to focus on moral education more than physical and mental punishment.
>> CORRECT!

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
126060 Homework ±Ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-02-28 356
126059 Homework ¹è*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-02-28 390
126058 How do you support the \\ Àå*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-02-28 380
126057 March 1st ±Ç*ÀÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-28 2
126056 2/28 °í*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-02-28 4
126055 homework 02-27 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-02-27 236
126054 2023-2/27 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-27 245
126053 Why do you think people commit crimes? ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-02-27 331
126052 Do you think that people have the right to own a gun? Why or why... ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-02-27 266
126051 The changes happening in my country. ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-02-27 324
126050 Insect ÃÖ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-27 257
126049 Cat ÃÖ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-02-27 852
126048 Homework ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-27 218
126047 The best pets ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-27 323
126046 homework ½Å*ÈÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-27 273
126045 homework ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-27 242
126044 Could you tell me about a situation that someone made a decision... ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-02-27 316
126043 homework ½Å*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-02-27 0
126042 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-27 316
126041 Homework from the Feedback (17) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-27 520

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04