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서비스 입니다.

The big event which made me change

작성자: 김*영
2023-04-13 1195

회원님의 영작문

As you know, I got an accident so i've broken my ankle. That accident kind of event made change the attitude about my healthy.
Before the accident, I didn't much care about my healthy. I easily skip the meal and ignore the advice which my mom usually said like "YOU SHOULD TAKE A VITAMIN EVERY SINGLE DAY!". I've had low blood pressure so I felt dizziness often but I didn't care and kept my bad lifestyle.
After the accident, I realize the importance of healthy care. So, I have the meal 3 times in a day also take a vitamin well.
I'm not sure these things are working well or not, but I guess the placebo effect works so the good life habit made me feel relieve.
I hope, even though I'll get better from now, I still keep doing healthy lifestyle with some exercising.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi Ellen, 
The reality is that changing your life starts with changing the way you see everything in your life. Change can be a difficult and slow process, but if you can see things just a little differently, you can start to see big progress. Changing your thinking is not only to be more optimistic but giving your mind the breathing room it needs to grow and expand. And change can help you become more focused in your life and know what you want out of it. When you experience changes, it can create a ripple effect. This can affect everything in your life, including your relationship. ~ Teacher QUENNY

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
As you know, I got an accident so i've broken my ankle. That accident kind of event made change the attitude about my healthy.
>> As you know, I got an accident so I've broken my ankle. That accident was a kind of event that made changed my attitude about my health.
Before the accident, I didn't much care about my healthy. I easily skip the meal and ignore the advice which my mom usually said like "YOU SHOULD TAKE A VITAMIN EVERY SINGLE DAY!". I've had low blood pressure so I felt dizziness often but I didn't care and kept my bad lifestyle.
>> Before the accident, I didn't care much about my health. I easily skip the meal and ignore the advice which my mom usually said like "YOU SHOULD TAKE A VITAMIN EVERY SINGLE DAY!". I've had low blood pressure so I often felt dizzy but I didn't care and kept my bad lifestyle.
After the accident, I realize the importance of healthy care. So, I have the meal 3 times in a day also take a vitamin well.
>> After the accident, I realize the importance of health care. So, I have a meal 3 times a day and also take a vitamin well.
I'm not sure these things are working well or not, but I guess the placebo effect works so the good life habit made me feel relieve.
>> I'm not sure if these things are working well or not, but I guess the placebo effect works so the good life habit made me feel relieved.
I hope, even though I'll get better from now, I still keep doing healthy lifestyle with some exercising.
>> I hope, even though I'll get better now, I still keep doing a healthy lifestyle with some exercise.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
As you know, I got an accident so i've broken my ankle. That accident kind of event made change the attitude about my healthy.
Before the accident, I didn't much care about my healthy. I easily skip the meal and ignore the advice which my mom usually said like "YOU SHOULD TAKE A VITAMIN EVERY SINGLE DAY!". I've had low blood pressure so I felt dizziness often but I didn't care and kept my bad lifestyle.
After the accident, I realize the importance of healthy care. So, I have the meal 3 times in a day also take a vitamin well.
I'm not sure these things are working well or not, but I guess the placebo effect works so the good life habit made me feel relieve.
I hope, even though I'll get better from now, I still keep doing healthy lifestyle with some exercising.
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