¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2023-04-04 636

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Hello. It's Tuesday.
While it is clear and warm outside, I am very stressed now inside the building.
Around 1 month ago when I move our clinic to here, I signed up for PC guard service.
The staff of the company told me that it could prevent any virus and data leakage, and he promised that we would not feel any discomfort.
However, I felt discomfort to share our data in the clinic everyday.
In addition, Dr.MJ's file were broken last seminar(maybe you remembered it).
This morning, I requested something simple to customer service, but they even didn't know how to do that.
I was so surprised about it, and I realized that I signed up with immature company.
I called the staff and told him that I wanted to cancel this service.
I think he will accept my cancellation.
Meanwhile, Dr.MJ also looked upset.
I have to keep my mind peaceful, or I will make a big mistake.
Regarding my homework, I experienced "Mallory-Weiss syndrome" in my college years.
You can Google it.
Have a peaceful day!

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi again, Dr. Kim!

I am sorry to hear about the inefficient service you encountered today. Bad customer service is when a business fails to meet your expectations in terms of service quality, response time, or overall customer experience. Compromised data can lead to many problems for a business or organization like yours in your clinic. If a data breach occurs or sensitive information is mishandled, it can erode any goodwill a company has earned from clients or customers. I hope that you were able to address this issue today.

I suggest, ask the cancellation policy or process well. If it is already done, good for you. You are right. Keeping your mental peace is so important because it can help you remain calm in the face of distress by easing feelings of anxiety, worry, and overwhelm.

Finally, as I Googled the worst disease you ever had, " Mallory-Weiss tear will stop bleeding and begin to heal on its own in most cases. Sometimes you will need treatment. An endoscope may be used to give you an injection or a heat treatment to stop the bleeding, or insert a clip that closes the tear and stops the bleeding." Tell me more about it in class.

Thus, observe the suggestions I made to your composition. Some are word order, and others are insertion of articles such as 'an'. Overall, excellent work!

See you!

-T. Donna~

Hello. It's Tuesday.
>> Correct!

While it is clear and warm outside, I am very stressed now inside the building.
>> Correct!

Around 1 month ago when I move our clinic to here, I signed up for PC guard service.
>> Around one month ago when I (moved to our clinic/moved here to out clinic), I signed up for PC guard service.

The staff of the company told me that it could prevent any virus and data leakage, and he promised that we would not feel any discomfort.
>> Correct! Very good sentence!

However, I felt discomfort to share our data in the clinic everyday.
>> Correct!

In addition, Dr.MJ's file were broken last seminar(maybe you remembered it).
>> In addition, Dr.MJ's file was broken last seminar (maybe you remember it).

This morning, I requested something simple to customer service, but they even didn't know how to do that.
>> This morning, I requested something simple to the customer service, but they even didn't know how to do that.

I was so surprised about it, and I realized that I signed up with immature company.
>> I was so surprised about it, and I realized that I signed up with an immature company.

I called the staff and told him that I wanted to cancel this service.
>> Correct!

I think he will accept my cancellation.
>> Correct!

Meanwhile, Dr.MJ also looked upset.
>> Correct!

I have to keep my mind peaceful, or I will make a big mistake.
>> Correct!

Regarding my homework, I experienced "Mallory-Weiss syndrome" in my college years.
>> Correct!

You can Google it.
>> Correct!

Have a peaceful day!
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
130428 HOMRWORK ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-23 1
130427 Do you think that governments should encourage public transport... ÀÌ*¾ç ¿Ï·á 2023-08-23 2165
130426 Some people think that a person improves intellectual skills... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-08-23 1
130425 The advantages and disadvantages of texting or sending messages È«*±â ¿Ï·á 2023-08-23 2243
130424 What was the most exciting part of the concert? ¼Û*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-08-23 0
130423 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-23 1
130422 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-23 2428
130421 What\'s your thought on cardiovascular exercise? º¹*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-23 4
130420 What was the biggest thing you have accomplished this week? ±è*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2023-08-23 2555
130419 homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-23 2586
130418 ¤µ ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-23 2187
130417 When did you last hang out with your friends? ±è*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2023-08-23 2382
130416 Why is it necessary to keep one\'s privacy in this... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-23 2720
130415 What is the first thing that you always do when you visit a new... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-23 2071
130414 The importance of having a vacation ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-23 2899
130413 The importance of advertising a product ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-23 2508
130412 WRITING TASK: What was your favorite trip? Please tell me the... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-08-23 3
130411 Homework : If you had to eat one meal for the rest of your life,... ÃÖ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2023-08-23 2445
130410 What are the usual consequences of being tardy or absent? Á¶*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-08-23 1
130409 How can different generations improve their communication with... ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-23 2704

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04