¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

4.3 homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±Ç*¸²
2023-04-03 279

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think that 13-14 is best owning to smartphone.
When the smartphone is not invention, they have a phone when they adult.
But after smartphone is invention, the age of owning a smartphone has become younger.
It is not good for children brain. And also it is easy to be exposed to provocative things.
But if they don¡¯t have smartphone, they are difficult to make friends.
Nevertheless, I think that later given smartphone is better than younger.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Thank you for your homework, Ye Lim!

Keep up the great work!

-Hanna ^^

I think that 13-14 is best owning to smartphone.

>>I think ages 13-14 is the best age for owning a smartphone.
When the smartphone is not invention, they have a phone when they adult.

>>If the smartphone is not yet invented now, they will have one when they become an adult.
But after smartphone is invention, the age of owning a smartphone has become younger.

>>But after smartphone was invented, the age of owning one has become younger.
It is not good for children brain. 

>>It is not good for children's young mind. 

And also it is easy to be exposed to provocative things.

>>Correct.
But if they don¡¯t have smartphone, they are difficult to make friends.

>>But if they don't have smartphones, they will find it difficult to make friends.
Nevertheless, I think that later given smartphone is better than younger.

>>Nevertheless, I think it is better to have a smartphone when you're older.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
127275 If you have more money right now, how will you invest it? Share... ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-04-08 4
127274 Korean traditional Thanksgiving ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-08 190
127273 In your opinion, what are the keys for a successful marriage? ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-04-07 3
127272 Write down answer for speaking task about \'Neighborhood\' ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-04-07 4
127271 In your opinion, what are the keys for a successful marriage? ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-04-07 2
127270 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-04-07 0
127269 When you are stressed, how do you feel physically? Àå*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-04-07 310
127268 Who is always willing to help you even when you don\'t ask for... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-07 163
127267 What are the advantages and disadvantages of cosmetic surgery? Áö* ¿Ï·á 2023-04-07 3
127266 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-04-07 0
127265 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-04-07 0
127264 4.6 Homework ¹Ú*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-07 181
127263 When you are stressed, how do you feel physically? Á¶*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-04-07 230
127262 Home work ±è*¶õ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-07 1
127261 Writing task ¾È*Çü ¿Ï·á 2023-04-07 169
127260 today\'s homework Ãß*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-04-07 3
127259 I think it\'s better to have technology À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-04-07 252
127258 ¡°Dream¡± shoes!!! ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-04-06 184
127257 home work ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-06 220
127256 homework ½Å*ÈÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-06 158

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04