¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2023-03-29 697

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Good afternoon, T.Donna.
After I heard about Dr.MJ's divorce, I felt so bad about it.
As you know, I argued with my wife last monday morning.
And she texted me that she wanted to divorce.
Thus, I thought of that word "divorce" all day.
I couldn't give up my family to keep my selfish pride.
Divorce usually brings unhappiness, I think.
I couldn't focus on my work this morning.
I thought I knew his family well, but I didn't.
Although Dr. MJ insisted that he told me about his divorce before, I actually can't believe it.
When he wants to hide his weak points, he sometimes lies.
I know this very well.
He tried to show me his best look, but I noticed that he felt bad about it; The fact that I knew about his divorce.
To prevent a breakup, we should consider the situation that my partner faced.
Sometime, our people just want us to empathize with them.
If I am healthy in both of physical and mental, I can empathize with my wife the most.
Thus, I have to keep my body and mind healthy.
See you.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good evening, Dr. Kim!

When a friend or a close person to you breaks down in relationship , it is challenging to know what to say to someone going through hard times. Everyone suffers from loss differently. It is impossible to predict how anyone will react to news of a divorce. For some, divorce is a welcome end to a marriage that isn¡¯t working. For others, it can be the most devastating experience they will ever go through. If you do not know what to say to a friend going through divorce, you better not speak about it until Dr. MJ will be ready to tell all about it.

Perhaps you felt  a level of deception somehow- betrayal and distrust between your relational partner at work. Deception crosses relational rules considered to be a negative violation of your expected norms. In short, as a colleague and a brother, he should have at least told you the truth. But as aforementioned, Dr. MJ has his reasons he will reveal in time.

I wish I could say meaningful things about marriage and how to keep it last but you are the better person to do that. What I know is that, marriage is a vow and a commitment people make- a decision to choose only that one person forever as Corinthians 13, 4-7 in the Bible states: 

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."

The strength of your essay lies in its authenticity of experience and cohesive and grammatically correct sentences. 

See you soon!

-T. Donna~
 
Good afternoon, T.Donna.
>> Correct!

After I heard about Dr.MJ's divorce, I felt so bad about it.
>> Correct!

As you know, I argued with my wife last monday morning.
>> Correct!

And she texted me that she wanted to divorce.
>> Correct!

Thus, I thought of that word "divorce" all day.
>> Correct!

I couldn't give up my family to keep my selfish pride.
>> Correct! Very good sentence!

Divorce usually brings unhappiness, I think.
>> Correct!

I couldn't focus on my work this morning.
>> Correct!

I thought I knew his family well, but I didn't.
>> Correct!

Although Dr. MJ insisted that he told me about his divorce before, I actually can't believe it.
>> Correct!

When he wants to hide his weak points, he sometimes lies.
>> Correct!

I know this very well.
>> Correct!

He tried to show me his best look, but I noticed that he felt bad about it; The fact that I knew about his divorce.
>> Correct! Excellent sentence!
Or: He tried to show me his best look but I noticed that he felt bad about it; the fact that I knew about his divorce.

To prevent a breakup, we should consider the situation that my partner faced.
>> To prevent a breakup, we should consider the situation that our partner face.

Sometime, our people just want us to empathize with them.
>> Sometimes, our people just want us to empathize with them.

If I am healthy in both of physical and mental, I can empathize with my wife the most.
>> Correct!

Thus, I have to keep my body and mind healthy.
>> Correct!

See you.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
125765 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-18 2
125764 Homework ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-02-18 1
125763 Would you rather have many skills or just a few excellent skills? ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-02-18 2
125762 2023-2/17 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-17 508
125761 Should we clone extinct plants and animals? Why or why not? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-02-17 523
125760 Do you believe that social media do more harm than good? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-02-17 464
125759 If I don¡¯t get enough sleep,¡¦ ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-02-17 367
125758 HOMEWORK È«*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-02-17 4
125757 [Writing Task] If you were a teacher, which subject would you... ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-17 260
125756 homework 02.17 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-02-17 177
125755 homework ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-17 186
125754 homework ½Å*ÈÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-17 184
125753 How do you practice long patience? ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-02-17 467
125752 Peer preasure¡¦ ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-02-17 371
125751 What do you think will happen if you will not support Ukraine as... ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-02-17 4
125750 If you could change one law it your country, what would it be... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-02-17 252
125749 What problems did you have in your adolescence? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-02-17 215
125748 What would be your perfect Valentine\'s Day? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-02-17 242
125747 home work ¹è*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-17 222
125746 i can explain the best 3 words is see, wait, write À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-02-17 310

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04