¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2023-03-29 142

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Good afternoon, T.Donna.
After I heard about Dr.MJ's divorce, I felt so bad about it.
As you know, I argued with my wife last monday morning.
And she texted me that she wanted to divorce.
Thus, I thought of that word "divorce" all day.
I couldn't give up my family to keep my selfish pride.
Divorce usually brings unhappiness, I think.
I couldn't focus on my work this morning.
I thought I knew his family well, but I didn't.
Although Dr. MJ insisted that he told me about his divorce before, I actually can't believe it.
When he wants to hide his weak points, he sometimes lies.
I know this very well.
He tried to show me his best look, but I noticed that he felt bad about it; The fact that I knew about his divorce.
To prevent a breakup, we should consider the situation that my partner faced.
Sometime, our people just want us to empathize with them.
If I am healthy in both of physical and mental, I can empathize with my wife the most.
Thus, I have to keep my body and mind healthy.
See you.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good evening, Dr. Kim!

When a friend or a close person to you breaks down in relationship , it is challenging to know what to say to someone going through hard times. Everyone suffers from loss differently. It is impossible to predict how anyone will react to news of a divorce. For some, divorce is a welcome end to a marriage that isn¡¯t working. For others, it can be the most devastating experience they will ever go through. If you do not know what to say to a friend going through divorce, you better not speak about it until Dr. MJ will be ready to tell all about it.

Perhaps you felt  a level of deception somehow- betrayal and distrust between your relational partner at work. Deception crosses relational rules considered to be a negative violation of your expected norms. In short, as a colleague and a brother, he should have at least told you the truth. But as aforementioned, Dr. MJ has his reasons he will reveal in time.

I wish I could say meaningful things about marriage and how to keep it last but you are the better person to do that. What I know is that, marriage is a vow and a commitment people make- a decision to choose only that one person forever as Corinthians 13, 4-7 in the Bible states: 

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."

The strength of your essay lies in its authenticity of experience and cohesive and grammatically correct sentences. 

See you soon!

-T. Donna~
 
Good afternoon, T.Donna.
>> Correct!

After I heard about Dr.MJ's divorce, I felt so bad about it.
>> Correct!

As you know, I argued with my wife last monday morning.
>> Correct!

And she texted me that she wanted to divorce.
>> Correct!

Thus, I thought of that word "divorce" all day.
>> Correct!

I couldn't give up my family to keep my selfish pride.
>> Correct! Very good sentence!

Divorce usually brings unhappiness, I think.
>> Correct!

I couldn't focus on my work this morning.
>> Correct!

I thought I knew his family well, but I didn't.
>> Correct!

Although Dr. MJ insisted that he told me about his divorce before, I actually can't believe it.
>> Correct!

When he wants to hide his weak points, he sometimes lies.
>> Correct!

I know this very well.
>> Correct!

He tried to show me his best look, but I noticed that he felt bad about it; The fact that I knew about his divorce.
>> Correct! Excellent sentence!
Or: He tried to show me his best look but I noticed that he felt bad about it; the fact that I knew about his divorce.

To prevent a breakup, we should consider the situation that my partner faced.
>> To prevent a breakup, we should consider the situation that our partner face.

Sometime, our people just want us to empathize with them.
>> Sometimes, our people just want us to empathize with them.

If I am healthy in both of physical and mental, I can empathize with my wife the most.
>> Correct!

Thus, I have to keep my body and mind healthy.
>> Correct!

See you.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
126849 What animals do you want to see? ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-03-23 0
126848 What are the advantages and disadvantages of traveling alone? õ*¶õ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-23 1
126847 homework 03.23 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-03-23 87
126846 Define failure. ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-03-23 0
126845 Is it easy for you to say goodbye to a close friend or relative,... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-03-23 3
126844 Happy ¹Ú*¶÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-23 135
126843 homework ½Å*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-03-23 1
126842 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-23 135
126841 How would you like to carry out the ministry God wanted you to... ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-03-23 1037
126840 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-23 80
126839 Laughter is the best medicine ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-03-23 254
126838 Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Most... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-03-23 0
126837 homework ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-23 301
126836 homework ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-23 203
126835 homework ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-23 91
126834 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-23 100
126833 Hw ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-23 0
126832 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-23 188
126831 Among the four seasons, which one do you like the most? Áö* ¿Ï·á 2023-03-23 1
126830 The health and medicine. ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-23 351

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04