¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

When do you say that a person is overexercising?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*½½
2023-03-28 330

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Although It is quiet ambigous criterion to judge whether over-excercising or not, we can generally say that a person is over-exercising when a person feels a burden after finishing the excercising.
For example, I make a conclusion as I am overexcercising when i am extremely tired and feel muscle pain.
This pain makes me hard to climbing a stair and walking so it give a lots of burden for my daily life.
Therefore it is very important to confirm a one's work out level and set a proper objective of excercise :-)(I realized this time haha).
Also, it is very necessary to take proper meals to provide fluent nutrition to our body after finishing the excercise since we lose some calories during workout.
Anyway, I feel that I have to take several rest days to recover my body. I will start my next excercise on thursday or friday :-)

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there, Kate!
Thank you for this composition and I am impressed with how you have used your vocabulary.  So for this composition, I am just rewriting and providing you with tiny corrections, especially on spelling and punctuation. In general, you did a wonderful job!
Enjoy the rest of the day!
Aki~
 
Although It is quiet ambigous criterion to judge whether over-excercising or not, we can generally say that a person is over-exercising when a person feels a burden after finishing the excercising.
>>> Although It is quite an ambiguous criterion to judge whether over-exercising or not, we can generally say that a person is over-exercising when a person feels a burden after finishing the exercise.

For example, I make a conclusion as I am overexcercising when i am extremely tired and feel muscle pain.
>>>  For example, I make a conclusion as I am overexercising when I am extremely tired and feel muscle pain.

This pain makes me hard to climbing a stair and walking so it give a lots of burden for my daily life.
>>>  This pain makes me hard to climb a stair and walk so it gives me a lot of burden on my daily life.

Therefore it is very important to confirm a one's work out level and set a proper objective of excercise :-)(I realized this time haha).
>>>  Therefore it is very important to confirm one's workout level and set a proper objective for exercise.

Also, it is very necessary to take proper meals to provide fluent nutrition to our body after finishing the excercise since we lose some calories during workout.
>>>  Also, it is very necessary to take proper meals to provide fluent nutrition to our body after finishing the exercise since we lose some calories during the workout

Anyway, I feel that I have to take several rest days to recover my body. I will start my next excercise on thursday or friday :-)
>>> Anyway, I feel that I have to take several rest days to recover my body. I will start my next exercise on Thursday or Friday 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
126041 Homework from the Feedback (17) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-27 137
126040 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-27 0
126039 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-02-27 2
126038 HOMEWORK FOR TODAY: ESSAY: Many governments think that economic... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-02-27 2
126037 Homework ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-02-27 0
126036 Why is Eglish fluency signicant for me? ÀÌ*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-02-27 2
126035 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-02-27 4
126034 Monday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-02-27 172
126033 Essay ¼Û*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-02-27 0
126032 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-02-27 110
126031 Lesson 12 ; Homework ±è*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-02-27 121
126030 collecting ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-27 1
126029 What are some reasons why Western people live a \'YOLO\' life... ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-02-27 2
126028 What is your favorite movie soundtrack? Why do you like it? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-27 0
126027 My trip ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-27 1
126026 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-27 1
126025 Do you think change is important in people\'s life? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-27 0
126024 homework Æí*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-27 1
126023 My opinion regarding bullying ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-02-27 144
126022 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-02-27 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04