¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿µ
2023-03-24 950

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

If I were a comfort woman I wouldn¡¯t accept any money from both KOERA and JAPAN governments or the war criminal companies. I will want for JAPAN and Japanese to apologize to all of comfort women and to admit their crime from the bottom of their heart continuously. That is point and they must not forget their crime.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Here's your edited composition, Ju Yeong. 
Thanks for sending it. Speak to you next week!
Happy weekend there to you! 

Cheers,
Jean~~




          If you were a comfort woman, would you accept the money given by Korean companies as your compensation?

If I were a comfort woman I wouldn¡¯t accept any money from both KOERA and JAPAN governments or the war criminal companies. 
>> If I were a comfort woman, I wouldn¡¯t accept any money from both the KOREAN and JAPANESE governments or the war crime companies. 

I will want for JAPAN and Japanese to apologize to all of comfort women and to admit their crime from the bottom of their heart continuously. 
>> I would want for JAPAN and the Japanese to apologize to all of the comfort women out there and to admit their crime from the bottom of their hearts, and that shouldn't be a fleeting feeling of being apologetic and acknowledgment of fault. 

That is point and they must not forget their crime.
>> That is the main point in this issue and they must not forget their crime. 
>> OR: The crux of the matter is that they must not forget their crime. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
129963 Writing task ¾È*Çü ¿Ï·á 2023-08-04 2270
129962 Homework JA*UNG CHUNG ¿Ï·á 2023-08-04 3184
129961 If you made a video about August, what would you put in it? ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-08-04 2438
129960 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-04 2767
129959 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-04 2405
129958 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-03 2450
129957 Do you think a diverse population is good for your country? ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-08-03 2
129956 Do you think cramming, parroting, or just memorizing is a good... ¾ö*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-03 3127
129955 What are your ideal working conditions? º¹*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-03 1
129954 If you could change nationality, which other nationality would... ±¸*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-03 1
129953 Is the interview important? Why and why not? Á¶*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-08-03 1
129952 homework 08.03 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-08-03 3044
129951 Why do you think children like chocolate? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-03 2817
129950 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-08-03 0
129949 Choose one that you like, Chocolate, Ice cream or Candies and... ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-08-03 1554
129948 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-03 3421
129947 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-03 2549
129946 How do you feel the evening before the weekend starts? Á¶*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-08-03 0
129945 Homework ÁÖ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-03 2335
129944 Homework ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2023-08-03 3886

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04