무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

The health and medicine.

작성자: 김*영
2023-03-23 348

회원님의 영작문

I guess that not just me but most of the people were under the stress. It is the obvious cause to trigger disease.
Therefore, we need to know how to control the stress well.
Also, it is important to heal when you suffer form any diseases. In Korea, some prefer to the traditional medicine the other prefer to the western medicine depending on their ages. The old usually tend to have the tradition one but the young prefer to the western one.
Furthermore, if someone want to see the effect immediately, they need to take the western one. On the other hand, if people want to improve or change strengthen constitution, they usually go to the oriental medical clinic. Moreover, In Korea, when people want to lose weigh, they would take the medicine both. The western one is more cheaper than the traditional one so people tend to take western one.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi Ellen, 
Traditional medicine is health practices, approaches, knowledge, and beliefs incorporating plant, animal, and mineral-based medicines, spiritual therapies, manual techniques, and exercises, applied singularly or in combination to treat, diagnose and prevent illnesses or maintain well-being. While  Modern medicine was built around the model of running tests on sick patients to determine which drug or medical procedure would best deal with some illness. This makes Modern Medicine more precise in determining the diagnosis and how to treat this specific disease. And Naturopathy is a form of healthcare that combines modern treatment with traditional methods. It includes alternative, natural therapies to modern medicine. Naturopathy focuses on the body's capacity to heal itself. ~ Teacher QUENNY

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I guess that not just me but most of the people were under the stress. It is the obvious cause to trigger disease.
Therefore, we need to know how to control the stress well.
Also, it is important to heal when you suffer form any diseases. In Korea, some prefer to the traditional medicine the other prefer to the western medicine depending on their ages. The old usually tend to have the tradition one but the young prefer to the western one.
Furthermore, if someone want to see the effect immediately, they need to take the western one. On the other hand, if people want to improve or change strengthen constitution, they usually go to the oriental medical clinic. Moreover, In Korea, when people want to lose weigh, they would take the medicine both. The western one is more cheaper than the traditional one so people tend to take western one.
>> I guess that not just me but most people were under the stress. It is the obvious cause of triggering the disease. Therefore, we need to know how to control stress well.
Also, it is important to heal when you suffer from any disease. In Korea, some prefer traditional medicine while others prefer western medicine depending on their ages. Old people usually tend to have the traditional one but the young new generation people prefer the western one.
Furthermore, if someone wants to see the effect immediately, they need to take the western one because I think that's more effective compared to traditional medicines.  On the other hand, if people want to improve or change and strengthen the constitution, they usually go to the oriental medical clinic. Moreover, In Korea, when people want to lose weight, they would take the medicine both. The western one is cheaper compared to the traditional one so people tend to take the western one.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I guess that not just me but most of the people were under the stress. It is the obvious cause to trigger disease.
Therefore, we need to know how to control the stress well.
Also, it is important to heal when you suffer form any diseases. In Korea, some prefer to the traditional medicine the other prefer to the western medicine depending on their ages. The old usually tend to have the tradition one but the young prefer to the western one.
Furthermore, if someone want to see the effect immediately, they need to take the western one. On the other hand, if people want to improve or change strengthen constitution, they usually go to the oriental medical clinic. Moreover, In Korea, when people want to lose weigh, they would take the medicine both. The western one is more cheaper than the traditional one so people tend to take western one.
번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
126842 homework 김*연 완료 2023-03-23 133
126841 How would you like to carry out the ministry God wanted you to... 류*선 완료 2023-03-23 1036
126840 homework 김*연 완료 2023-03-23 78
126839 Laughter is the best medicine 김*윤 완료 2023-03-23 254
126838 Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Most... 앨* 완료 2023-03-23 0
126837 homework 이*우 완료 2023-03-23 299
126836 homework 이*우 완료 2023-03-23 202
126835 homework 이*우 완료 2023-03-23 91
126834 Homework 김*우 완료 2023-03-23 98
126833 Hw 에*미 완료 2023-03-23 0
126832 Thursday homework 류*우 완료 2023-03-23 186
126831 Among the four seasons, which one do you like the most? 지* 완료 2023-03-23 1
126830 The health and medicine. 김*영 완료 2023-03-23 348
126829 Do you believe in love at first sight? Why? 김*지 완료 2023-03-23 152
126828 Homework 함*주 완료 2023-03-23 1
126827 How would you describe an ideal weekend 김*미 완료 2023-03-23 827
126826 Homework 전*영 완료 2023-03-23 69
126825 What are the disadvantages of using food delivery services? 지* 완료 2023-03-23 1
126824 Are there any forbidden places in your country? 지* 완료 2023-03-23 1
126823 Stop woring out 민*정 완료 2023-03-23 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]