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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Homework

작성자: 김*우
2023-03-22 454

회원님의 영작문

Hi.
I don't know why, but I am so exausted now.
Maybe, working everyday is stacking my fatigue.
Meanwhile, I heard that our senior male manager lost his cousin yesterday.
That's why I thought that the manager won't come to the clinic today.
However, he came to the clinic so early than as usual.
He is diligent, kind, and professional.
Thus, Dr MJ and I expect him to help us more in the upcoming days.
There was also interesting thing, at least, for me.
Our franchise company had some money in the account, and Dr. MJ who is the CED of that company allowed me to spend some of it.
Hence, I ordered some whiskeys for our franchise.
Of course, I will drink most of them.
When I was young, I looked my parents living their life with diligence and good to others.
They tried to not harm others at all all the time.
They also taught me not to lie, but I coudn't keep it.
I lie to my clients everyday.
"You look so young. You just only should do this, and you will be perfect."
Isn't it funny?
See you.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hello, Dr. Kim!

Most of the time, fatigue can be traced to one or more lifestyle issues, such as poor sleep habits or lack of exercise. Fatigue can be caused by a medicine or linked to depression. Sometimes, as you already know it, fatigue is a symptom of an illness that needs treatment. I hope you are not the later.

Ultimately, good employees are productive, which creates great working environments and increases overall productivity.When people are doing their jobs effectively, morale in the clinic gets a boost. Employees who aren't motivated to get the job done as can bring down an entire working place. It is important to foster a positive, energetic work environment. Cultivate one by rewarding high-performing employees with incentives and group recognition during meetings. High-performing offices also attract quality talent in recruiting, because the office feels alive and that it's working toward goals.

According to multiple studies, a glass of whisky a day can help reduce your risk of heart disease and heart failure. The rest of all the things I read on the Internet are ill effects. Take it easy on the booze.

Parents serve as role models not only through direct interactions with their children, but through the examples they set with their attitude and behavior within the family and in the outside world. As your parents taught you, you will pass it on to your little girls. So always model the things you want them to be someday.
The foundations of a doctor-patient relationship can remain strong even with “white lies,” as long as your actions are grounded in kindness and most importantly, science. 

I apologize for submitting the comments just right now. Yesterday, my son and I played badminton and soccer. My throat was so painful early in the morning due to exhaustion. Nevertheles, you shared your thoughts and daily activities in a very organized and humorous manner. Excellent work!

See you then!

-T. Donna~

Hi.
>> Correct!

I don't know why, but I am so exausted now.
>> Correct!

Maybe, working everyday is stacking my fatigue.
>> Correct!

Meanwhile, I heard that our senior male manager lost his cousin yesterday.
>> Correct!

That's why I thought that the manager won't come to the clinic today.
>> Correct!

However, he came to the clinic so early than as usual.
>> However, he came to the clinic so early than usual.

He is diligent, kind, and professional.
>> Correct!

Thus, Dr MJ and I expect him to help us more in the upcoming days.
>> Correct!

There was also interesting thing, at least, for me.
>>  There was also an interesting thing, at least, for me.

Our franchise company had some money in the account, and Dr. MJ who is the CED of that company allowed me to spend some of it.
>> Correct!
Or: CEO

Hence, I ordered some whiskeys for our franchise.
>> Correct!

Of course, I will drink most of them.
>> Correct!

When I was young, I looked my parents living their life with diligence and good to others.
>> When I was young, I looked at my parents living their lives with diligence and goodness to others.

They tried to not harm others at all all the time.
>> They tried not to harm others all the time.

They also taught me not to lie, but I coudn't keep it.
>> Correct!

I lie to my clients everyday.
>> Correct!

"You look so young. You just only should do this, and you will be perfect."
>> Correct!

Isn't it funny?
>> Correct!

See you.
>> Correct!
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