¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Writing task

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¾È*Çü
2023-03-19 401

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I expect that my generation will live more than 75 on average. Many people will be healthy because of the good technology. Also, they can eat various food and exercise themselves. So I think they can live 100 years. But sometimes, people can die suddenly. So 75 is my expectation.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Happy Monday, Robin!
I agree. With the advanced technology nowadays, people have a higher chance of living longer. However, there are still instances that technology can be the cause of early death like people becoming too lazy because of gadgets and appliances. By the way, good job with your sentences. Your English writing skills have greatly improved.
-T. Caitlyn
I expect that my generation will live more than 75 on average. 
>> CORRECT
Many people will be healthy because of the good technology. 
>> CORRECT
Also, they can eat various food and exercise themselves. So I think they can live 100 years. 
>> Also, they can eat various food and exercise so I think they can live up to 100 years. 
But sometimes, people can die suddenly. 
>> CORRECT
So 75 is my expectation.
>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
127765 homework ½Å*ÈÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-25 707
127764 Advantage or disadvantage of rent a house ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-25 4
127763 4.25 homework ±Ç*¸² ¿Ï·á 2023-04-25 823
127762 Homework ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-25 662
127761 Homework ¹è*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-04-25 894
127760 Give two sample sentences for each word: bury, expression, and... õ*¶õ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-25 2
127759 What do you wish you could bring home from the places you\'ve... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-25 730
127758 Is freedom of speech a necessity in a functional society? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-04-25 1
127757 Do you usually cook for your loved ones? Why or why not? Á¶*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-25 845
127756 What things do you love doing with your friends? ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-25 710
127755 Camping ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-25 806
127754 Losing something in traveling ¼º*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-25 1
127753 How do you introduce yourself in a Korean business setting? ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-25 1
127752 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-24 708
127751 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-04-24 2
127750 homework 04.24 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-04-24 769
127749 Can you tell me why you want to live in Canada? ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-04-24 812
127748 Homework ÇÏ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2023-04-24 2
127747 home work ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-24 1033
127746 homework Á¶* ¿Ï·á 2023-04-24 975

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04