¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Writing task

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¾È*Çü
2023-03-19 141

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I expect that my generation will live more than 75 on average. Many people will be healthy because of the good technology. Also, they can eat various food and exercise themselves. So I think they can live 100 years. But sometimes, people can die suddenly. So 75 is my expectation.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Happy Monday, Robin!
I agree. With the advanced technology nowadays, people have a higher chance of living longer. However, there are still instances that technology can be the cause of early death like people becoming too lazy because of gadgets and appliances. By the way, good job with your sentences. Your English writing skills have greatly improved.
-T. Caitlyn
I expect that my generation will live more than 75 on average. 
>> CORRECT
Many people will be healthy because of the good technology. 
>> CORRECT
Also, they can eat various food and exercise themselves. So I think they can live 100 years. 
>> Also, they can eat various food and exercise so I think they can live up to 100 years. 
But sometimes, people can die suddenly. 
>> CORRECT
So 75 is my expectation.
>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
126415 Would you like it to be spring forever? ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-10 151
126414 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-03-10 1
126413 Friday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-10 134
126412 homework ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-03-10 122
126411 Homework È«*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-03-10 1
126410 Lesson 17: Homework ±è*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-03-10 167
126409 3/9 ¼­*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-10 0
126408 3.10 homework ±Ç*¸² ¿Ï·á 2023-03-10 276
126407 Homework ¿ì*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-10 232
126406 ajumma ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-10 156
126405 3/10 homework ÃÖ*º½ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-10 173
126404 Social Relationships ±Ç*ÀÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-10 2
126403 It¡¯s really lucky that we have a weekend. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-03-10 125
126402 What are the things that you would like to do this year ÀÌ*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-03-09 2
126401 Hw ÃÖ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-03-09 137
126400 How can ADHD affect a person¡¯s activities of daily living and... ¹Ú*¸í ¿Ï·á 2023-03-09 198
126399 Home work ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-03-09 257
126398 Why do you think it is better to negotiate first than file a... ¾ç*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-03-09 188
126397 Homework - money °û*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-09 159
126396 1. travel 2. competition 3. interested 4. friends 5. schedule Á¤*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-09 160

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04