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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

What do you think are the dangers that hanging/posting too many banners pose? How do we prevent them

작성자: 황*하
2023-03-17 505

회원님의 영작문

Placard can be the effective advertisement method but there are a lot of ways to advertise their bussiness. It would be the best way to use internet advertisement because people use their smart phone all the ways and access internet explore every day. Actually, I haven't thought banners can be the dangers before I read the news but I realized that it would be the serious problem because people can't see what it is, if it is dark. Especially, it can be high risk for children because their are not careful compare to adults. They easily are exposured the dangers. I don't think that it is the important politicians to express their messages on the banners. I want them to do their duties well instead of careing their popularities. It is also bad for our environment. According to the news, there are tons of trashes that will destroy our nation. To follow world's movemnet, we should not use unnessary things for those purpose.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Good day, Sir Hwang!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


Placard can be the effective advertisement method but there are a lot of ways to advertise their bussiness. 
>> Placards can be an effective advertisement method but there are a lot of ways to advertise their business. 
It would be the best way to use internet advertisement because people use their smart phone all the ways and access internet explore every day. 
>> It would be the best way to use internet advertisement because people use their smart phone all the time and access internet explorer every day. 
Actually, I haven't thought banners can be the dangers before I read the news but I realized that it would be the serious problem because people can't see what it is, if it is dark. 
>> CORRECT!
Especially, it can be high risk for children because their are not careful compare to adults. 
>> Especially, it can be high risk for children because they are not careful compare to adults. 
They easily are exposured the dangers. 
>> They easily are exposed to the dangers. 
I don't think that it is the important politicians to express their messages on the banners. 
>> I don't think that it is important to politicians to express their messages on the banners. 
I want them to do their duties well instead of careing their popularities. 
>> I want them to do their duties well instead of caring for their popularities. 
OR >>  I want them to do their duties well instead of caring for their fame.
It is also bad for our environment. 
>> CORRECT!
According to the news, there are tons of trashes that will destroy our nation. 
>> CORRECT!
To follow world's movemnet, we should not use unnessary things for those purpose.
>> To follow world's movement, we should not use unnecessary things for those purpose.
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