무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Why is going to the military considered a state duty? Should military service be mandatory or option

작성자: 황*하
2023-03-17 591

회원님의 영작문

Korea is only one country which is devided with two countries in the world. There always be risk of war because we are in ceasefire now so we want to make an agreement with North Korea to end of the war. In addition, Korea is located around the powerful nations such as China, Japan and Russia. We need to prevent our country by ourself. That's why we have choosen conscription. Men who don't have mental and physical problem have to join the army mandatorily. There were a lot of problem in the army. Most people have experienced physical violence from their senior during conscription period that might be serious injury. Victims couldn't get proper treatment although, they have suffered from assault. It is common to hide whatever have happened in the army because sergents don't want to speread it to public. Administors in the army have realized that military culture must be changed years ago, but there still be victim there. So, what if we can hire soldiers with high sarary, it would be th

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Good day, Sir Hwang!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

Korea is only one country which is devided with two countries in the world. 
>> Korea is only one country which is divided into two countries in the world. 
There always be risk of war because we are in ceasefire now so we want to make an agreement with North Korea to end of the war. 
>> There will always be risk of war because we are in ceasefire now so we want to make an agreement with North Korea to end the war.
In addition, Korea is located around the powerful nations such as China, Japan and Russia. 
>> CORRECT!
We need to prevent our country by ourself. 
>> We need to prevent our country by ourselves. 
That's why we have choosen conscription. 
>> That's why we have chosen conscription. 
Men who don't have mental and physical problem have to join the army mandatorily. 
>> CORRECT!
There were a lot of problem in the army. 
>> There were a lot of problems in the army. 
Most people have experienced physical violence from their senior during conscription period that might be serious injury. 
>> Most people have experienced physical violence from their senior during conscription period that might result to serious injuries. 
Victims couldn't get proper treatment although, they have suffered from assault. 
>> CORRECT!
It is common to hide whatever have happened in the army because sergents don't want to speread it to public. 
>> It is common to hide whatever have happened in the army because sergeants don't want to spread it to the public. 
Administors in the army have realized that military culture must be changed years ago, but there still be victim there. 
>> Administrators in the army have realized that military culture must have been changed years ago, but there were still victims there. 
So, what if we can hire soldiers with high sarary, it would be th
>> So, if we hire soldiers with high salary, it would be their benefit to take advantage of the others in the military.
번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
124392 I would!!! 김*윤 완료 2022-12-23 602
124391 What does the expression, \"money doesn\'t grow on trees\" mean?... 김*민 완료 2022-12-23 809
124390 homework 박*경 완료 2022-12-23 515
124389 Which five or more extreme sports can you quickly name? 태*서 완료 2022-12-23 626
124388 homework 박*은 완료 2022-12-23 136
124387 HOMEWORK: Make a sentence for each of the words/ expressions. 1.... 앨* 완료 2022-12-23 1
124386 homework 정*호 완료 2022-12-23 2
124385 homework 김*연 완료 2022-12-23 630
124384 homework 김*연 완료 2022-12-23 552
124383 Extreme sports: 김*윤 완료 2022-12-23 647
124382 christmas 김*라 완료 2022-12-23 1
124381 Friday homework 류*우 완료 2022-12-23 565
124380 X-mas 박*준 완료 2022-12-23 562
124379 Homework 함*주 완료 2022-12-23 2
124378 Homework 박*민 완료 2022-12-23 2
124377 Opinion of Santa Claus 임*윤 완료 2022-12-23 557
124376 12/23 고*진 완료 2022-12-23 6
124375 Homework (12/22) 에*미 완료 2022-12-23 3
124374 How many books have you read in English? 임*호 완료 2022-12-23 1
124373 Are you good at socializing with others? 김*규 완료 2022-12-23 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]