¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

my room is the best gift

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: À±*Çý
2023-03-16 666

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

my family is 6 person.
when I lived in my house with six person.
I shared the room with my younger sister. that is so unlucky thing!
Because she and my mother had a lot of fight, that make me some tired.
and when I was 17 years old, we're moved it more better place.
and I had only my room, that time's make me happy.
Because anybody don't touch me, and I had some relax.

so I think, the best gift is bring my own space.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Da Hye,

Even the most outgoing and social people require a quiet spot. Your bedroom ought to be a haven of peace where you can curl up with a good book, unplug and watch TV, or simply relax away from the world. It's important to have alone time. By having the space designed how you desire, you can achieve greater motivation and a positive influence on your work and home life.

~Teacher Cathy

 

my family is 6 person.

>> There are six people in my family.

when I lived in my house with six person.

>> And I lived in my house with six people.

I shared the room with my younger sister.

>> I shared a room with my younger sister.

that is so unlucky thing!

>> That is so unfortunate!

Because she and my mother had a lot of fight, that make me some tired.

>> Because she and my mother fight a lot, and it's making me tired.

and when I was 17 years old, we're moved it more better place.

>> But when I was 17, we moved to a better place.

and I had only my room, that time's make me happy.

>>I had my room to myself, which made me happy.

Because anybody don't touch me, and I had some relax.

>> Because nobody can disturb me and I have time to relax.

so I think, the best gift is bring my own space.

>>So I believe the best gift is to have my own space.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
124829 My musical tates ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-01-12 399
124828 The reason why both men and women spend much money on beauty... ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-12 1613
124827 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-01-12 3
124826 homework ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-12 605
124825 What is your favorite childhood memory? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-01-12 723
124824 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-01-12 1
124823 Do you worry about your old age? ¼±* ¿Ï·á 2023-01-12 634
124822 ¿µÀÛ ¼÷Á¦ ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-12 0
124821 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-12 579
124820 Future ±è*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2023-01-12 1
124819 How do you feel about South Korea becoming a super-aged society... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-12 547
124818 ESSAY: Nowadays both men and women spend much money on beauty... È«*±â ¿Ï·á 2023-01-12 518
124817 My homework Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-01-12 926
124816 What is your all-time favorite movie? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-12 514
124815 Why do people greet each other? ±è*½½ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-12 480
124814 Will computers become smarter than humans one day? Is this a bad... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-12 506
124813 What is the right age to introduce gadgets to children? Why? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-12 408
124812 123 ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-12 614
124811 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-12 380
124810 Volunteer ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-12 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04