¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

my room is the best gift

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: À±*Çý
2023-03-16 641

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

my family is 6 person.
when I lived in my house with six person.
I shared the room with my younger sister. that is so unlucky thing!
Because she and my mother had a lot of fight, that make me some tired.
and when I was 17 years old, we're moved it more better place.
and I had only my room, that time's make me happy.
Because anybody don't touch me, and I had some relax.

so I think, the best gift is bring my own space.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Da Hye,

Even the most outgoing and social people require a quiet spot. Your bedroom ought to be a haven of peace where you can curl up with a good book, unplug and watch TV, or simply relax away from the world. It's important to have alone time. By having the space designed how you desire, you can achieve greater motivation and a positive influence on your work and home life.

~Teacher Cathy

 

my family is 6 person.

>> There are six people in my family.

when I lived in my house with six person.

>> And I lived in my house with six people.

I shared the room with my younger sister.

>> I shared a room with my younger sister.

that is so unlucky thing!

>> That is so unfortunate!

Because she and my mother had a lot of fight, that make me some tired.

>> Because she and my mother fight a lot, and it's making me tired.

and when I was 17 years old, we're moved it more better place.

>> But when I was 17, we moved to a better place.

and I had only my room, that time's make me happy.

>>I had my room to myself, which made me happy.

Because anybody don't touch me, and I had some relax.

>> Because nobody can disturb me and I have time to relax.

so I think, the best gift is bring my own space.

>>So I believe the best gift is to have my own space.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
125145 2023-1/27 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-27 572
125144 The best movie for a date is¡¦ ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-01-27 686
125143 homework ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-01-27 0
125142 homework ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-27 570
125141 Do you think people should have plastic surgery to enhance their... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-27 481
125140 How can you overcome stage fright? ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-01-27 534
125139 Homework from the Feedback (4) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-27 638
125138 The perfect neighbor. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-01-27 549
125137 What makes you angry and why? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-01-27 485
125136 Answer : What is your favorite Seollal Holiday memory? Á¤*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-27 484
125135 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-27 0
125134 Friday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-27 388
125133 homework ½Å*ÈÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-27 348
125132 What is your feeling about mandatory military service in your... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-27 554
125131 help ±è*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2023-01-27 0
125130 Explaining how am i adjusting to going back to your studies... ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-27 499
125129 I think ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-27 617
125128 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-01-27 1
125127 What change do you want for yourself this year? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-01-27 1
125126 1/27 Homework ÃÖ*º½ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-27 695

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04