¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

my room is the best gift

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: À±*Çý
2023-03-16 776

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

my family is 6 person.
when I lived in my house with six person.
I shared the room with my younger sister. that is so unlucky thing!
Because she and my mother had a lot of fight, that make me some tired.
and when I was 17 years old, we're moved it more better place.
and I had only my room, that time's make me happy.
Because anybody don't touch me, and I had some relax.

so I think, the best gift is bring my own space.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Da Hye,

Even the most outgoing and social people require a quiet spot. Your bedroom ought to be a haven of peace where you can curl up with a good book, unplug and watch TV, or simply relax away from the world. It's important to have alone time. By having the space designed how you desire, you can achieve greater motivation and a positive influence on your work and home life.

~Teacher Cathy

 

my family is 6 person.

>> There are six people in my family.

when I lived in my house with six person.

>> And I lived in my house with six people.

I shared the room with my younger sister.

>> I shared a room with my younger sister.

that is so unlucky thing!

>> That is so unfortunate!

Because she and my mother had a lot of fight, that make me some tired.

>> Because she and my mother fight a lot, and it's making me tired.

and when I was 17 years old, we're moved it more better place.

>> But when I was 17, we moved to a better place.

and I had only my room, that time's make me happy.

>>I had my room to myself, which made me happy.

Because anybody don't touch me, and I had some relax.

>> Because nobody can disturb me and I have time to relax.

so I think, the best gift is bring my own space.

>>So I believe the best gift is to have my own space.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
128800 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-12 0
128799 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-12 2804
128798 homework 06.12 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-06-12 823
128797 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-12 753
128796 How many hours of sleep do you have every day? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-06-12 851
128795 The most interesting outdoor activity for me ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-12 1023
128794 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-12 1
128793 What types of diets have you heard of? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-12 1294
128792 How should someone who committed a crime for some good cause be... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-12 1284
128791 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-12 1074
128790 diary ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-12 0
128789 Studying Engish ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-12 1
128788 Bad Experience in first impression ¼º*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-12 1
128787 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-12 1085
128786 Writing task ¾È*Çü ¿Ï·á 2023-06-12 1008
128785 Dining out with a group of friends ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-12 1064
128784 alarm ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-12 1099
128783 Please use the word \"birthday\" in a sentence. ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-12 0
128782 Hello ÀÓ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-06-12 0
128781 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-12 950

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04