¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Peace of world

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Á¶*¿µ
2023-03-13 113

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think it¡¯s kind of difficult before rid themselves of greed.
The reasons of war are greeds.
Even through it¡¯s difficult to be in peace, but we always try to solve the problem of world.
Always we have to think about living together world people.
Then we get better little by little.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Yeong!
This is a very simple and direct answer.
This is actually a good answer.
Thanks:)
~~ Teacher James
I think it¡¯s kind of difficult before rid themselves of greed.
>>> I believe it will be difficult for them to overcome their greed.
The reasons of war are greeds.
>>>Greed is the root cause of war.
Even through it¡¯s difficult to be in peace, but we always try to solve the problem of world.
>>> Even though it is difficult to live in peace, we always strive to solve the world's problems.
Always we have to think about living together world people.
>>> We must always consider how people around the world coexist.
Then we get better little by little.
>>> CORRECT
>>OR: Then we gradually get better.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
126307 homework 03.07 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-03-07 139
126306 Sua Lee ÀÌ*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-07 111
126305 Homework ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-07 116
126304 Do you think you are good at time management? Do you always do... ÀÌ*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-03-07 3
126303 Is education only for the young? What do people learn when they... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-03-07 3
126302 Hw ÃÖ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-07 110
126301 I want to tell other students m learning English¡¦ ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-03-07 155
126300 homework ½Å*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-03-07 0
126299 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-07 105
126298 Hw ÃÖ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-03-07 159
126297 How do you act when you are happy? Do you like being around... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-03-07 160
126296 homework ä*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-07 104
126295 HOMEWORK FOR TODAY: DIRECTION: Choose the most suitable adverb... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-03-07 1
126294 Homework ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-07 1
126293 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-07 0
126292 Tuesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-07 121
126291 Writing task ¾È*Çü ¿Ï·á 2023-03-07 144
126290 homework ½Å*ÈÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-07 111
126289 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-07 1
126288 3.6/3.7 homework ±Ç*¸² ¿Ï·á 2023-03-07 155

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04