¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2023-03-05 868

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Hello, T.Donna.
There's been a sad thing.
My friend, who were dying because of stomach cancer, passed away last Friday.
As you know, she and I really wanted to meet before she goes to heaven, but we couldn't.
I visited the funeral hall last Friday and Saturday.
I met many college friends there.
As I saw her husband, I couldn't help but cry.
He is my college senior and very kind.
Above all, he loved my friend too much.
I also met her mother, and we hugged and shared our sadness.
My friend went to better place for sure.
She has no pain there and we will meet again after a few decades.
In spite of sadness, I had to focus on my clinic in worktime.
It was a good start.
Fortunately, many of previous clients followed us.
In addition, there were many new clients and patients who lived nearby.
Because we have wider space, we need more staff.
Thus, we tried to hire more people.
About my homework, a lot of money didn't mean a success.
To satisfy our lives, we need enough money, though.
See you.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Dr. Kim!

I am deeply sorry for the loss of your friend. Grieving the loss of someone you care about might be incredibly difficult, and it's normal to feel overwhelmed by its intensity. Their family were greatly comforted by your presence. You are right, she is now in a better place of peace.

Meanwhile, it is crunchtime in your office even on the weekdays. Without your focus, many pstaff can become overwhelmed and start multitasking, procrastinating, or both. So, always set the standards high with your energy and motivation.

Happiness doesn¡¯t come from more money, more stuff or even big life events like getting a raise or landing that dream job. Our relationships and how happy we are in these relationships has a powerful influence on us. Given that healthy and happy relationships are universally important to all people, building a strong connection to our family and very good friends are truly wealthy.

Anyway, you wrote a lot of correct sentences here on your homework. Please visit my comments below. Congratulations on accomplishing this task excellently!

See you soon!

-T. Donna

Hello, T.Donna.
>> Correct!

There's been a sad thing.
>> Correct!

My friend, who were dying because of stomach cancer, passed away last Friday.
>> My friend, who was dying because of stomach cancer, passed away last Friday.

As you know, she and I really wanted to meet before she goes to heaven, but we couldn't.
>> Correct!

I visited the funeral hall last Friday and Saturday.
>> Correct!

I met many college friends there.
>> Correct!

As I saw her husband, I couldn't help but cry.
>> Correct!

He is my college senior and very kind.
>> Correct!

Above all, he loved my friend too much.
>> Correct!

I also met her mother, and we hugged and shared our sadness.
>> Correct!

My friend went to better place for sure.
>> My friend went to a better place for sure.

She has no pain there and we will meet again after a few decades.
>> Correct!

In spite of sadness, I had to focus on my clinic in worktime.
>> Correct!

It was a good start.
>> Correct!

Fortunately, many of previous clients followed us.
>> Correct!

In addition, there were many new clients and patients who lived nearby.
>> Correct!

Because we have wider space, we need more staff.
>> Because we have a wider space, we need more staff.

Thus, we tried to hire more people.
>> Correct!

About my homework, a lot of money didn't mean a success.
>> About my homework, a lot of money doesn't mean a success.

To satisfy our lives, we need enough money, though.
>> Correct!

See you.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
130590 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 0
130589 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 0
130588 What are the disadvantages of long trips? Á¶*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 0
130587 The importance of waking up early. ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 1
130586 Homework JA*UNG CHUNG ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 1329
130585 question ¼­*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 1
130584 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 1953
130583 How can we possibly reduce the number of delinquents in the... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 1586
130582 WRITING TASK: Please tell me about your favorite Korean history. ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 3
130581 What is the best advice to give to your fellow parents who have... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 2181
130580 How do you think cyberbullying affects the lives of those... ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 1578
130579 What is the most challenging thing for you? ÀÌ*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 1465
130578 How do we make sure that we are not compromising our health... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 2426
130577 The reason why I study English ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 1
130576 What is your favorite memory with your friends? ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 3
130575 What do you think is the biggest change in how families are in... ÀÌ*¾ç ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 1642
130574 homework Àå*¼® ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 1637
130573 Word ¼º*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 1908
130572 Do you prefer studying alone or in a group? Why? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 2
130571 I would¡¦ ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 1702

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04