¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

In your opinion, what types of food should people consume to prevent cancer? What about the food tha

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2023-02-28 144

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

There are a lot of food that help keeping our health. The best way to keep our health is liveing without stress. Many professionals suggest people to smile as much as possible. However, food is also important to prevent cancer. It is well known that fresh fruits, vegetables, grain are healthy food. Nutritionists encourage patients to eat those food regardless of cooked or not. However, it might cause other disease, if people have same food a lot for a long time. It is better having small meal frequently rather eat it a lot at once. Doctors and medical professionals stress the importance of what patients eat. Patients should avoid smoking and alchol consumption. In addition, it is not good having fresh meat and fishs because it might cause stomach illness due to the infection. The best thing to keep health is eating a balanced diet of all kinds of food.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Sir Hwang!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

There are a lot of food that help keeping our health. 
>> CORRECT!
The best way to keep our health is liveing without stress.
>> The best way to keep our health is living without stress.
OR >> The best way to keep ourselves is to avoid being stressed.
 Many professionals suggest people to smile as much as possible. 
>> CORRECT!
However, food is also important to prevent cancer. 
>> CORRECT!
It is well known that fresh fruits, vegetables, grain are healthy food. 
>> It is well known that fresh fruits, vegetables, and grains are healthy food. 
Nutritionists encourage patients to eat those food regardless of cooked or not. 
>> Nutritionists encourage patients to eat those food regardless if cooked or not. 
OR >> Nutritionists encourage patients to eat those food regardless if cooked or raw. 
However, it might cause other disease, if people have same food a lot for a long time. 
>> CORRECT!
It is better having small meal frequently rather eat it a lot at once. 
>> It is better to have small meals frequently rather than eating it all at once. 
Doctors and medical professionals stress the importance of what patients eat. 
>> CORRECT!
Patients should avoid smoking and alchol consumption. 
>> Patients should avoid smoking and alcohol consumption. 
In addition, it is not good having fresh meat and fishs because it might cause stomach illness due to the infection. 
>> In addition, it is not good having fresh meat and fishes because it might cause stomach illness due to the infection. 
The best thing to keep health is eating a balanced diet of all kinds of food.
>> The best thing to keep our health is through eating a balanced diet of all kinds of food.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
125947 homework 02.23 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-02-23 143
125946 homework ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-23 101
125945 Do you work better alone or with a group? Why? ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-02-23 1
125944 Lesson 11: homework ±è*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-02-23 109
125943 HOMEWORK Àå*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-02-23 94
125942 homework ½Å*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-02-23 0
125941 homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-23 206
125940 Thank you ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-23 197
125939 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-02-23 2
125938 the reason why outdoor activities are important to student. ¹Ú*º° ¿Ï·á 2023-02-23 177
125937 friends, begin letter A ¹Ú*¶÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-23 96
125936 What life lesson did you learn today after your service? ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-02-23 193
125935 HOMEWORK FOR TODAY: ESSAY: What is your favorite subject? Why? ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-02-23 1
125934 Homework ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-02-23 1
125933 What do you do when you see discrimination? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-02-23 136
125932 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-02-23 1
125931 Sleep is indispensable meaning of existence to me. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-02-23 119
125930 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-02-23 0
125929 Writing task ¾È*Çü ¿Ï·á 2023-02-23 109
125928 How can dissatisfied South Koreans be content/satisfied? Share... ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-02-23 6

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04