¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

In your opinion, what types of food should people consume to prevent cancer? What about the food tha

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2023-02-28 138

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

There are a lot of food that help keeping our health. The best way to keep our health is liveing without stress. Many professionals suggest people to smile as much as possible. However, food is also important to prevent cancer. It is well known that fresh fruits, vegetables, grain are healthy food. Nutritionists encourage patients to eat those food regardless of cooked or not. However, it might cause other disease, if people have same food a lot for a long time. It is better having small meal frequently rather eat it a lot at once. Doctors and medical professionals stress the importance of what patients eat. Patients should avoid smoking and alchol consumption. In addition, it is not good having fresh meat and fishs because it might cause stomach illness due to the infection. The best thing to keep health is eating a balanced diet of all kinds of food.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Sir Hwang!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

There are a lot of food that help keeping our health. 
>> CORRECT!
The best way to keep our health is liveing without stress.
>> The best way to keep our health is living without stress.
OR >> The best way to keep ourselves is to avoid being stressed.
 Many professionals suggest people to smile as much as possible. 
>> CORRECT!
However, food is also important to prevent cancer. 
>> CORRECT!
It is well known that fresh fruits, vegetables, grain are healthy food. 
>> It is well known that fresh fruits, vegetables, and grains are healthy food. 
Nutritionists encourage patients to eat those food regardless of cooked or not. 
>> Nutritionists encourage patients to eat those food regardless if cooked or not. 
OR >> Nutritionists encourage patients to eat those food regardless if cooked or raw. 
However, it might cause other disease, if people have same food a lot for a long time. 
>> CORRECT!
It is better having small meal frequently rather eat it a lot at once. 
>> It is better to have small meals frequently rather than eating it all at once. 
Doctors and medical professionals stress the importance of what patients eat. 
>> CORRECT!
Patients should avoid smoking and alchol consumption. 
>> Patients should avoid smoking and alcohol consumption. 
In addition, it is not good having fresh meat and fishs because it might cause stomach illness due to the infection. 
>> In addition, it is not good having fresh meat and fishes because it might cause stomach illness due to the infection. 
The best thing to keep health is eating a balanced diet of all kinds of food.
>> The best thing to keep our health is through eating a balanced diet of all kinds of food.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
126001 What do you like the most about that holiday? ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-02-26 137
126000 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-26 130
125999 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-26 137
125998 [Writing Task] What things do you always need to bring when you... ¹Ú*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-25 1
125997 i had some bed storys:) À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-02-25 5
125996 Have you ever been in a difficult situation while traveling? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-02-25 137
125995 Can you talk about three things you like about yourself? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-02-25 247
125994 homework02.25 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-02-25 160
125993 How do koreans celebrate happy events? ±¸*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-02-24 5
125992 my puppy is cookie ÀÌ*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-24 1430
125991 A good mother. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-02-24 105
125990 Kingking ÃÖ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-02-24 3
125989 Courteous ÃÖ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-24 291
125988 home work 2/23 ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-24 119
125987 What name would you give your robot if you had one? Why? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-24 88
125986 Describe a time you made an unpopular decision. How did you... ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-02-24 137
125985 Write a situation you know of or experienced that applies a... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-02-24 2
125984 homework ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-24 218
125983 homework ½Å*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-02-24 2
125982 season ¹Ú*¶÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-24 134

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04