¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

A good mother.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*À±
2023-02-24 265

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

No. A good mother doesn't have to give up her job and stay at home with her children. A good mother is one who can relate emotionally. Leaving her job doesn't mean she is missing out on emotional connection. And it is also a good mother to raise them financially. Of course, her job will reduce her time to take care of her children. However, this is decided between their families, and it is not right for a third party to say anything after seeing such a situation(Except for abuse). A good mother can be if she can express that she loves her children.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Sheila! ^^
Thank you for the composition.
See you in our next class! :)

~ Teacher Tricia

No. A good mother doesn't have to give up her job and stay at home with her children. 
>>> CORRECT!

A good mother is one who can relate emotionally.
>>> CORRECT!

Leaving her job doesn't mean she is missing out on emotional connection. 
>>> Leaving her job doesn't mean she is missing out on the emotional connection. 

And it is also a good mother to raise them financially. 
>>> CORRECT!

Of course, her job will reduce her time to take care of her children. 
>>> CORRECT!

However, this is decided between their families, and it is not right for a third party to say anything after seeing such a situation(Except for abuse). 
>>> However, this is decided between their families, and it is not right for a third party to say anything after seeing such a situation (except for abuse).

A good mother can be if she can express that she loves her children.
>>> CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
126427 Hello! My name _____ Carl. I _____ from Australia. I _____ 13... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-03-11 2
126426 HOMEWORK ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-11 1
126425 Meeting new people ¹é*¾ð ¿Ï·á 2023-03-11 0
126424 Homework ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-11 2
126423 I like watching pizza shows. ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-11 2
126422 homework 03.10 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-03-10 606
126421 machine ¹Ú*¶÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-10 598
126420 homework ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-10 361
126419 Homework ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-10 564
126418 3/8 hamework °­*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-10 3
126417 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-03-10 2
126416 How can you convince someone not to skip classes? ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-03-10 3
126415 Would you like it to be spring forever? ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-10 419
126414 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-03-10 1
126413 Friday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-10 370
126412 homework ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-03-10 373
126411 Homework È«*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-03-10 1
126410 Lesson 17: Homework ±è*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-03-10 454
126409 3/9 ¼­*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-10 0
126408 3.10 homework ±Ç*¸² ¿Ï·á 2023-03-10 547

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04