¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think the way people look at failure plays a big part in how successful they become?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*°æ
2023-02-24 928

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I don¡¯t let others decide whether my life is successful or not. How terrible life it is if my life should be determined by others, not me who knows myself better than any other. I don¡¯t deny that we don¡¯t need to be conscious of others, We can be better off with the precious advice of others. What I am trying to say is that It is myself that can judge my life at the end of my life.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Here's your edited composition, Steve.
Thanks for sending it. 

Cheers,
Jean~~



Do you think the way people look at failure plays a big part in how successful they become?

How terrible life it is if my life should be determined by others, not me who knows myself better than any other. 
>> How terrible life would be if it were determined by others, not by me who knows myself better than any other person out there.  

I don¡¯t deny that we don¡¯t need to be conscious of others, We can be better off with the precious advice of others. 
>> I don¡¯t deny the fact that I believe we don¡¯t need to be conscious of others, we can be better off without the precious advice of others. 
>> [ NOTE: The two statements are contradictory so I find it confusing. I interpreted it the way I understood it. ]

What I am trying to say is that It is myself that can judge my life at the end of my life.
>> What I am trying to say is that ultimately, I myself can judge my own life. 
>> [ NOTE: I'm not sure if I understood your statement correctly, at any rate, the above is my interpretation. ]

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
130589 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 0
130588 What are the disadvantages of long trips? Á¶*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 0
130587 The importance of waking up early. ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 1
130586 Homework JA*UNG CHUNG ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 1336
130585 question ¼­*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 1
130584 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 1956
130583 How can we possibly reduce the number of delinquents in the... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 1603
130582 WRITING TASK: Please tell me about your favorite Korean history. ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 3
130581 What is the best advice to give to your fellow parents who have... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 2189
130580 How do you think cyberbullying affects the lives of those... ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 1581
130579 What is the most challenging thing for you? ÀÌ*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 1476
130578 How do we make sure that we are not compromising our health... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 2431
130577 The reason why I study English ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 1
130576 What is your favorite memory with your friends? ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 3
130575 What do you think is the biggest change in how families are in... ÀÌ*¾ç ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 1679
130574 homework Àå*¼® ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 1677
130573 Word ¼º*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 1944
130572 Do you prefer studying alone or in a group? Why? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 2
130571 I would¡¦ ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 1728
130570 What advice would you give to someone who is considering... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-08-29 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04