¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

the reason why outdoor activities are important to student.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹Ú*º°
2023-02-23 665

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

some students feel tired from studying. In that case, it is good to relieve fatigue by doing outdoor activities. and it can provent many disease from stress of studying. outdoor activities are really important to study. some people say studying is a physical fight. so doing studying with steady outdoor activities are better than only doing studying

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Stella!
Thank you for completing your homework. 
You did great in expressing your ideas! Keep it up! ^^
-T.Jhozel 
some students feel tired from studying. 
>> Correct!
OR: 
Some students become exhausted while studying.
In that case, it is good to relieve fatigue by doing outdoor activities. 
>> In that case, doing outdoor activities can relieve fatigue.
and it can provent many disease from stress of studying. 
>> It can also prevent causing many diseases as a result of the stress of studying.
outdoor activities are really important to study. 
>>  Outdoor activities are really important for studying.
some people say studying is a physical fight. 
>> Some people think that studying is a physical struggle.
so doing studying with steady outdoor activities are better than only doing studying
>> So studying combined with consistent outdoor activities is preferable to studying alone.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
124412 My New Year¡¯s resolution ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-12-26 593
124411 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-12-26 1
124410 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-26 543
124409 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-26 696
124408 Who\'re you? Santa C.! Who\'s that? That\'s me! No way! Yes way!... ±è*À² ¿Ï·á 2022-12-26 718
124407 Sensitivity ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-26 2
124406 12/26 °í*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-12-26 3
124405 23.Dec.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-26 3
124404 What\'s the funniest book you have ever read? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-26 674
124403 Who is your favorite actor and why? Answer in a few sentences. ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-26 685
124402 Did you enjoy your trip to Suwon? What is the best thing about... ¾ç*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-12-25 753
124401 Does social media improve people¡¯s communication skills? Why or... ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-25 655
124400 What makes you happy? Why does it make you happy? :) ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-25 611
124399 How is social media changing parent and child relationships? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-25 616
124398 What countries would you not like to visit and why? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-25 1
124397 How can people socialize better? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-12-25 0
124396 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-25 525
124395 I need your explanation about grammar ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-24 597
124394 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-24 1
124393 Homework(12/23) ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-23 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04