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담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
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Homework

작성자: 김*우
2023-01-31 685

회원님의 영작문

Hello.
This is a pleasant night.
Actually, I drank a little whiskey to celebrate to complete our January.
In fact, our income last December was down, so I worried about it.
However, this January, our income was recovered.
That's because Dr. MJ and I worked very hard every day except holiday and Sunday.
As we calculated our income and payment, we felt so happy, because we found our possibility to achieve higher income.
There's been many changes in my clinic these days.
Tomorrow, Dr. Bae who will take the current clinic will come to our clinic and he will learn from me for several days.
He told us he would come to us with his chief manager.
Hence, I let my staff to prepare for the space for them.
As I told you, we don't have enough space for us, so we will be more crowded for new people.
In addition, I will go through a harder time, because I have to teach Dr. Bae about my clinic during my work.
Always time flows naturally.
I am looking forward to the future in my new building.
See you.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Good afternoon, Dr. Kim!

Since you had a pleasant night, you also had a very pleasant speaking performance in class. A whiskey in moderation is a good way to celebrate at the end of the month indeed! You and everyone in your clinic especially Dr. MJ worked so hard to achieve a very good income for January. Cheers to a new month!

By now, I think that Dr. Bae is in your clinic. I am sure that you have enough space for everyone including him. As you teach him, you will master everything you tell him. Best of luck! 

Moving to your new space is definitely one of the highlights of this year. Make sure to not stress about things  in your new space and keep good energy and attitude while working so that your patients can feel your care and concern in helping them look and feel better.

Always read the suggestions regarding your grammar and sentences. I appreciate your hard work, patience, and diligence.

Catch you later!

-T. Donna~

Hello.
>> Correct!

This is a pleasant night.
>> Correct!

Actually, I drank a little whiskey to celebrate to complete our January.
>> Correct!

In fact, our income last December was down, so I worried about it.
>> Correct!

However, this January, our income was recovered.
>> However, this January, our income recovered.

That's because Dr. MJ and I worked very hard every day except holiday and Sunday.
>> That's because Dr. MJ and I worked very hard every day except holidays and Sundays.

As we calculated our income and payment, we felt so happy, because we found our possibility to achieve higher income.
>> Correct!
Or: As we calculated our income and payment, we felt so happy, because we found a possibility to achieve higher income.

There's been many changes in my clinic these days.
>> Correct!

Tomorrow, Dr. Bae who will take the current clinic will come to our clinic and he will learn from me for several days.
>> Correct!

He told us he would come to us with his chief manager.
>> He told us that he will come to us with his chief manager.

Hence, I let my staff to prepare for the space for them.
>>  Hence, I let my staff prepare a space for them.

As I told you, we don't have enough space for us, so we will be more crowded for new people.
>> As I told you, we don't have enough space for us, so we will be more crowded with new people.

In addition, I will go through a harder time, because I have to teach Dr. Bae about my clinic during my work.
>> Correct!

Always time flows naturally.
>> Correct!
Or: Time always flows naturally.

I am looking forward to the future in my new building.
>> Correct!

See you.
>> Correct!
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