¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

How much do you value your time?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*°æ
2023-01-13 536

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I once imagined what I would do if I had more time. If my memory serves me right, I wanted to study real estate investment to be much happier with wealth. However, I don't like chasing a wild goose. And I always try to be down to earth. What¡¯s more important is that I am very content with this life although I don¡¯t have enough me-time. I am happy to see my three children and help my wife with house chores.

I know how valuable my time is on hectic days so under the tactics of choice and focus I focus my time on the most important two of the following: first, I invest my time in English studying. For many reasons, studying English benefits me. Second, I focus my time on Bible study. As a Christian, I have been taught that knowledge is the most important thing in this world and the world to come. I try to make many fruits in the two above under any circumstances at all costs.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good evening Steve. Here is your composition. ^_^
T. Irene
I once imagined what I would do if I had more time. 
>>> Correct. 
If my memory serves me right, I wanted to study real estate investment to be much happier with wealth. 
>>> If my memory serves me right,  I wanted to study real estate investment when I was young to acquire wealth and happiness. 
However, I don't like chasing a wild goose. 
>>> However, I don't like to be on a wild goose chase. 
And I always try to be down to earth. 
>>> I also want to maintain being down to earth. 
What¡¯s more important is that I am very content with this life although I don¡¯t have enough me-time. 
>>> Correct.
I am happy to see my three children and help my wife with house chores.
>>> Correct.
I know how valuable my time is on hectic days so under the tactics of choice and focus I focus my time on the most important two of the following: first, I invest my time in English studying.
>>> I know how valuable my time is on hectic days so under the tactics of choice and focus, I use my time on the most important of the following: One, I invest my time in English studying.
 For many reasons, studying English benefits me. 
>>> Correct.
OR
>>> Studying English benefits me a lot. 
Second, I focus my time on Bible study. 
>>> The other one is, I focus my time on Bible study. 
As a Christian, I have been taught that knowledge is the most important thing in this world and the world to come.
>>> As a Christian, I have been taught that knowledge is the most important thing in this world and the future to come.
I try to make many fruits in the two above under any circumstances at all costs.
>>> I try to maximize the use of both things mentioned above under any circumstances and at all costs.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
125012 Friday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 442
125011 holiday ±è*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 1
125010 What is your favorite AI? ¼Û*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 1
125009 What do you do when you have trouble sleeping? Explain. ¼Û*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 1
125008 Homework ¼Û*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 4
125007 My best ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 744
125006 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 1
125005 What new activity would you like to try doing in your free time? Àå*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 709
125004 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 693
125003 What\'s your favorite plant? Why? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 0
125002 If you were to evaluate yourself as a student of your current... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 3
125001 E-sport? ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-19 2
125000 How did you understand the sentence, \"We can now hear people... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-01-19 3
124999 I can ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-19 570
124998 What\'s your thought on students forming cliques in school? ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-01-19 2
124997 What makes you a good friend? Give examples. Explain. ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-01-19 4
124996 Homework from the Feedback ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-19 490
124995 homework ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-19 474
124994 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-19 470
124993 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-19 424

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04