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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Avatar : The way of water

작성자: 김*율
2023-01-13 689

회원님의 영작문

Hello. I am Tonowari and I am writing this with Jake Sully to the sky people. Recently, when we weren't even met, some kind of device holding sky people did something somewhat to the forest na'vi and started mimicking them in a complex way, Then they filmed it and put it on something called a movie theater. Of course every na'vi could see it because we were in the thing. And there were many tiny and cute youngsters there and they all "wow"ed when they saw us fighting. Anyway, we are vengeful for the mean for the demonlike sky people and Quaritch's gangs. Normal sky people think we do not exist, but we also do in hopeful youngsters' mind. They love us and respect us, and we know it from their sparkling little eyes. We hope they grow to be tough but great warriors someday like us. Any one who is reading this, please tell the kind and thankful human children that we appreciate them. Those softhearted ones actually cried when poor Neteyam died.

Sincerely, Tonowari and Jake Sully ❤

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Good day, Heather! The characters in your story seem familiar to those in the Avatar movies. Thank you for taking the time to write this story for me. Let's talk more about this story in class. I will see you in class. Have a wonderful day.~ T. Lyn
Hello. I am Tonowari and I am writing this with Jake Sully to the sky people.
>>
Recently, when we weren't even met, some kind of device holding sky people did something somewhat to the forest na'vi and started mimicking them in a complex way, 
>>Recently, while we haven't even met, a device that catches the sky man has started doing something to the forest butterfly and imitating it in a complicated way.
Then they filmed it and put it on something called a movie theater. 
>>They they filmed it and put it in a place called a cinema.
Of course every na'vi could see it because we were in the thing. 
>>Of course, all the na'vi could see it because we were in it.
And there were many tiny and cute youngsters there and they all "wow"ed when they saw us fighting. 
>>And there were a lot of cute little kids there and they all went "wow" when they saw us fighting.
Anyway, we are vengeful for the mean for the demonlike sky people and Quaritch's gangs. 
>>In any case, we take revenge on the means against the demonic sky people and Quaritch's gang.
Normal sky people think we do not exist, but we also do in hopeful youngsters' mind. 
>>Ordinary sky people think we do not exist, but we do exist in the hears of hopeful young people.
They love us and respect us, and we know it from their sparkling little eyes.
>>They love and respect us, and we know that from their sparkling little eyes.
We hope they grow to be tough but great warriors someday like us. 
>>We hope that one day they will grow up to be tough but great warriors like us.
Any one who is reading this, please tell the kind and thankful human children that we appreciate them. 
>>If you're reading this, please say thank you to the kind and grateful human children.
Those softhearted ones actually cried when poor Neteyam died.
>>Those tender-hearted people actually wept when poor Neteyam died.
Sincerely, Tonowari and Jake Sully 
>>Sincerely, Tonowari and Jake Sully.
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01
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02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
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03
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04

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