무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Do you worry about your old age?

작성자: 선*
2023-01-12 888

회원님의 영작문

The question is one of the biggest worries at the present. That I grow old is like giving up dreams because I am getting cowardly. Though I think I am still young, I am not as brave as I used to be. Society is becoming super-aged, so people start to worry about how to deal with induced problems, such as pensions, welfare systems, and emotional stability. Why is the super-aged society a problem? The aged are people who make up society, People think of the elderly as corpses or incompetent, that is they are useless. They are members of society and economical people. That is what I am worrying about. I can do whatever I want in my old age, so society needs to give unlimited opportunities to the elderly. The elderly try to help society to operate well. However the elderly had worked hard, so we admit their effort in the past. The government supports the elderly because they are not strong enough to work as much as the youth. Let's prepare our super-aged society in advance,

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi, Sun Jung!
I agree with what you've mentioned. Most of the time, when we hear the word "elderly", we think of people who cannot work and those who need assistance in doing daily activities. So I understand your worry when it comes to getting old and also how society will react towards you by that time.
-T. Caitlyn
The question is one of the biggest worries at the present. 
>> CORRECT
That I grow old is like giving up dreams because I am getting cowardly. 
>> As I grow older, it's like giving up my dreams because I'm becoming a coward.
Though I think I am still young, I am not as brave as I used to be. 
>> CORRECT
Society is becoming super-aged, so people start to worry about how to deal with induced problems, such as pensions, welfare systems, and emotional stability. 
>> CORRECT
Why is the super-aged society a problem? 
>> CORRECT
The aged are people who make up society, People think of the elderly as corpses or incompetent, that is they are useless. 
>> The elderly people are the ones who make up society and people think of them as corpses, incompetent, and useless.
They are members of society and economical people. 
>> CORRECT
That is what I am worrying about.
>> CORRECT
 I can do whatever I want in my old age, so society needs to give unlimited opportunities to the elderly. 
>> CORRECT
The elderly try to help society to operate well. 
>> Elderlies are trying to help society to operate well.
However the elderly had worked hard, so we admit their effort in the past. 
>> CORRECT
The government supports the elderly because they are not strong enough to work as much as the youth. 
>> CORRECT
Let's prepare our super-aged society in advance,
>> Let's prepare for a super-aged society in advance.

번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
125112 talk about the song you last sang. 박*연 완료 2023-01-27 1017
125111 1/26 homework 윤*현 완료 2023-01-27 853
125110 What do people from other countries usually think of when they... 김*윤 완료 2023-01-26 947
125109 2023-1/26 HOMEWORK 이*유 완료 2023-01-26 1064
125108 Do you know how to overcome fear? What is the best way? 임*윤 완료 2023-01-26 1130
125107 What do you fear missing out on the most? 김*규 완료 2023-01-26 4
125106 Gathering 박*우 완료 2023-01-26 1067
125105 A financial problem. 김*님 완료 2023-01-26 929
125104 Would you rather shop online or go to the physical store? 김*민 완료 2023-01-26 3
125103 Our personality is change living conditions. 김*수 완료 2023-01-26 910
125102 homework 박*경 완료 2023-01-26 1694
125101 Homework 김*우 완료 2023-01-26 1709
125100 I think the most overrated holiday is… 김*윤 완료 2023-01-26 761
125099 What do you think is the best movie from your country? Why? 김*경 완료 2023-01-26 1031
125098 Do you think there should be a world holiday for everyone on... 태*서 완료 2023-01-26 750
125097 Homework from the Feedback (3) 박*하 완료 2023-01-26 742
125096 What is the best way to deal with feelings of anger? 태*서 완료 2023-01-26 762
125095 What do you worry about getting older? 김*경 완료 2023-01-26 762
125094 What do you think when you look at yourself in the mirror? 신*섭 완료 2023-01-26 702
125093 What is your favorite Seollal Holiday memory? 김*경 완료 2023-01-26 758

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]