무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Bird Beak!

작성자: 김*율
2023-01-04 819

회원님의 영작문

This a new story of an ancient era's birds.

Beaks, Beaks, Go Away, No, No, No, Come Back! : In a very very VERY old temple, that was built 4920 thousand years ago, the King Bird and the Queen Bird was giving the crown to his dazzling daughter and his outstanding son. They were now 13 and were getting the bird crown made of fern. the Queen Bird and the King Bird will fly away and soon Queen Moonbow, the princess and king Sunbeam, the prince, will lead the temple. Sunbeam and Moonbow waited for their royal gift to arrive at the temple's roof nest. At that time, they had mouths, not beaks. They never wanted a beak. It was too hard and pointy. They leaned over to see the gift and they fell in. After a minute, they came out crying with a beak instead of a mouth. Everyone they eye contacted with turned thier mouths into beaks. Soon, every bird was having beaks. In forlorn, they adapted to the beaks and grew happy again. They could do much more things! That's why birds have beaks nowdays.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Good day, Heather! Thank you for the time you spent making a story about the bird's beak. I had fun reading it. We can talk more about it in class. I will see you.~ T. Lyn
Beaks, Beaks, Go Away, No, No, No, Come Back! : 
>>Title: "Beaks, Beaks, Go Away, No, No, No, Come Back!"
In a very very VERY old temple, that was built 4920 thousand years ago, the King Bird and the Queen Bird was giving the crown to his dazzling daughter and his outstanding son. 
>>In a very, very, very old temple build 4.92 million years ago, the King Bird and Queen Bird were giving crowns to a brilliant daughter and a brilliant son.
They were now 13 and were getting the bird crown made of fern. 
>>They were now 13 years old receiving new crowns made of fern.
the Queen Bird and the King Bird will fly away and soon Queen Moonbow, the princess and king Sunbeam, the prince, will lead the temple. 
>>The Queen Bird and King Bird will fly away, and soon Princess Moonbow and Prince Sunbeam will lead the temple.
Sunbeam and Moonbow waited for their royal gift to arrive at the temple's roof nest.
>>Sunbeam and Moonbow awaited the arrival of the royal gift to the roof nest of the temple.
At that time, they had mouths, not beaks. 
>>Correct.
They never wanted a beak. 
>>Correct.
It was too hard and pointy. 
>>The beak was too hard and pointed.
They leaned over to see the gift and they fell in. 
>>They leaned over to see the gift and fell into it.
After a minute, they came out crying with a beak instead of a mouth.
>>After a while, they came out crying with their beaks instead of mouths.
Everyone they eye contacted with turned thier mouths into beaks.
>>Everyone makes eye contact the mouth that turn into the beak.
Soon, every bird was having beaks. 
>>Soon, all birds will have beaks.
In forlorn, they adapted to the beaks and grew happy again. 
>>In their desolation, they adapted to their beaks and were happy again.
They could do much more things! 
>>They can do so much more with their beaks.
That's why birds have beaks nowdays.
>>That's why birds have beaks today.
번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
123617 What is the best way for police to keep neighborhoods safe? 류*주 완료 2022-11-16 2259
123616 Wednesday Homework 류*우 완료 2022-11-16 1917
123615 meet 김*라 완료 2022-11-16 1
123614 Do you agree that the police should be held accountable for what... 선* 완료 2022-11-16 1808
123613 Homework 함*주 완료 2022-11-16 1
123612 Some religions forbid blood transfusions. 김*문 완료 2022-11-16 2077
123611 senior 권*희 완료 2022-11-16 1878
123610 Will there always be poverty in the world? 이*태 완료 2022-11-16 1492
123609 I agree that alternative medicine obtained through tradition is... 김*준 완료 2022-11-16 2174
123608 I like to play sports rather than watch them 김*준 완료 2022-11-16 2021
123607 15.Nov 2022 김*정 완료 2022-11-16 4
123606 Which game are you best at? 임*호 완료 2022-11-16 0
123605 These days, there more and more younger people committing crimes... 서*영 완료 2022-11-16 1
123604 What is your favorite technology? 김*규 완료 2022-11-16 1
123603 Tests and exams are nessecary. 김*윤 완료 2022-11-16 2076
123602 What things make a great movie a great movie? 전*채 완료 2022-11-15 1548
123601 What do you think will happen if your country falls into a... 김*문 완료 2022-11-15 1262
123600 Homework 이*경 완료 2022-11-15 1523
123599 Homework 권*미 완료 2022-11-15 0
123598 Homework 권*미 완료 2022-11-15 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]