¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Is Christmas too commercial nowadays? How should a very traditional Christmas be spent?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*°æ
2022-12-27 1058

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

The Christmas season is sure to be a good chance for lagging commerce to bound up again. However, We shouldn¡¯t forget the original meaning of Christmas. I don¡¯t blame how commercial Christmas comes to be nowadays. But I want to say what is inside that counts. In short, we need to celebrate Christmas, reminding us of the true happiness of Christmas, that is, we can be drawn closer to God thanks to Jesus¡¯s sacrifice. Anyway, Christmas day is a blessed day. So Let us not only enjoy it ourselves but also share the happiness of the day with as many people as possible so that Christmas can be full of joy and happiness.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Steve! ^^
Thank you for the composition.
See you in our next class! :)

~ Teacher Tricia


The Christmas season is sure to be a good chance for lagging commerce to bound up again. 
>>> CORRECT!

However, We shouldn¡¯t forget the original meaning of Christmas. 
>>> CORRECT!

I don¡¯t blame how commercial Christmas comes to be nowadays. 
>>> CORRECT!

But I want to say what is inside that counts.
>>> CORRECT!

In short, we need to celebrate Christmas, reminding us of the true happiness of Christmas, that is, we can be drawn closer to God thanks to Jesus¡¯s sacrifice. 
>>> CORRECT!

Anyway, Christmas day is a blessed day. 
>>> CORRECT!

So Let us not only enjoy it ourselves but also share the happiness of the day with as many people as possible so that Christmas can be full of joy and happiness.
>>> CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
123782 The think of college in Koreans ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-11-25 0
123781 Books about relationship ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-11-25 0
123780 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-25 0
123779 24.Nov.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-25 3
123778 What sort of animals live at the beach? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-25 0
123777 Would you prefer an English teacher from your own country or one... Àü*ä ¿Ï·á 2022-11-24 1576
123776 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-11-24 2
123775 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-11-24 0
123774 Tr. Jean Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-11-24 7
123773 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-11-24 0
123772 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-24 1465
123771 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-24 1302
123770 Which of these is better for your health: eating healthy or... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-24 1528
123769 homework ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-11-24 1073
123768 Can you talk about three things you like about yourself? ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-11-24 5
123767 I love cold noodles ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-11-24 1521
123766 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-11-24 0
123765 Usually on birthdays, we eat with people close to us. ±è*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-24 1278
123764 First of all, there are lots of seniors living alone. So, they... ±è*¹® ¿Ï·á 2022-11-24 1454
123763 How can we solve social problems with scientific and... ±è*¹® ¿Ï·á 2022-11-24 1722

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04