¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Who do you think is better at saving money, boys or girls?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¹Î
2022-12-21 1401

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think girls will normally be good at saving money because generally, girls are better at managing something than boys. For example, girls normally like taking notes for their lessons and I think taking notes or a passbook will be helpful when they are managing their own finances. Also, moms usually manage family's finances, and girls are also female as moms, which means they can be better at taking care of their money.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Here's your edited composition, Chloe!

I appreciate your sending it. See you tomorrow!

Cheers,
Jean~~


Who do you think is better at saving money, boys or girls?
I think girls will normally be good at saving money because generally, girls are better at managing something than boys. 
>> or: If you ask me, girls are known to be better at managing things so I'd say they are also ahead of boys when it comes to saving money. 

For example, girls normally like taking notes for their lessons and I think taking notes or a passbook will be helpful when they are managing their own finances.
>> or: For instance, females are more inclined to take notes in class; what's more, I believe notes or passbooks will be helpful when handling their own financial affairs. 

Also, moms usually manage family's finances, and girls are also female as moms, which means they can be better at taking care of their money.
>> or: Not to mention, moms typically serve as home managers, and girls being females just like moms are, it's safe to assume that they are superior to men in terms of money matters. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
123635 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-17 45
123634 Homework ¼Û*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-11-17 3
123633 Which character from a book, movie or TV program would you like... ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-11-16 1408
123632 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-11-16 1
123631 Describe your favorite cafe ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-11-16 23
123630 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-16 1726
123629 Homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-16 1553
123628 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-11-16 0
123627 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-11-16 1713
123626 Do you believe human activities contribute to climate change? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-16 1161
123625 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-11-16 2
123624 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-16 1436
123623 Is reading in a second language a good way to practice that... ¾ç*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-11-16 1768
123622 What social media do you use these days? Why do you prefer... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-16 1555
123621 The most memorable ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-16 0
123620 What is a typical meal like from your country? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-16 0
123619 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-16 1
123618 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-11-16 0
123617 What is the best way for police to keep neighborhoods safe? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-16 1932
123616 Wednesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-11-16 1852

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04