¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Who do you think is better at saving money, boys or girls?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¹Î
2022-12-21 1622

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think girls will normally be good at saving money because generally, girls are better at managing something than boys. For example, girls normally like taking notes for their lessons and I think taking notes or a passbook will be helpful when they are managing their own finances. Also, moms usually manage family's finances, and girls are also female as moms, which means they can be better at taking care of their money.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Here's your edited composition, Chloe!

I appreciate your sending it. See you tomorrow!

Cheers,
Jean~~


Who do you think is better at saving money, boys or girls?
I think girls will normally be good at saving money because generally, girls are better at managing something than boys. 
>> or: If you ask me, girls are known to be better at managing things so I'd say they are also ahead of boys when it comes to saving money. 

For example, girls normally like taking notes for their lessons and I think taking notes or a passbook will be helpful when they are managing their own finances.
>> or: For instance, females are more inclined to take notes in class; what's more, I believe notes or passbooks will be helpful when handling their own financial affairs. 

Also, moms usually manage family's finances, and girls are also female as moms, which means they can be better at taking care of their money.
>> or: Not to mention, moms typically serve as home managers, and girls being females just like moms are, it's safe to assume that they are superior to men in terms of money matters. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
121607 homework À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-08-15 955
121606 When people are wealthy or successful, do they have a special... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-15 1215
121605 My hardship ±è*°â ¿Ï·á 2022-08-15 715
121604 What is the best thing about being married? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-08-15 1
121603 Homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-15 1119
121602 What are some reasons why privacy is important for you? ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-08-15 638
121601 What comes to mind when you hear the word ¡°rent¡±? ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2022-08-15 893
121600 What cartoons do young people watch today? Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2022-08-15 1169
121599 My son\'s room ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-15 2
121598 Today\'s adolescents Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-08-15 2
121597 What do you think is the best job? How about the worst job? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-15 774
121596 Tell me your favorite music genre and the reason you like it. ¼­*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-15 1114
121595 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-08-15 0
121594 What are some reasons why privacy is important for you? ±è*°â ¿Ï·á 2022-08-15 1533
121593 Homework ±è*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-15 1
121592 What do you think are the most important qualities a president... ¹é*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-08-15 505
121591 08.15.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-15 1
121590 Why is doing volunteer work important? ¹é*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-08-15 578
121589 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-15 931
121588 Camping ±è*À² ¿Ï·á 2022-08-15 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04