¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹Ú*¹Î
2022-12-12 1613

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Please tell me something about the last concert you watched / Tell me about the recent sport you played. Tell me in as much detail as you can about the game.

Actually I don¡¯t enjoy going to see concerts. So the last concert that I saw was when I went to the beer festival there were sone famous singers invited to that festival to make people exciting to enjoy the festival. The singer performed hiphop and rock genre.

The recent sport I played was bowling with my husband. Normally my husband does better than me. But on that day I have won the game! So it was extremely delightful that I had beat him. We actually bet the game fee before playing and because I won the game, I was able to play it for free.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Helen, 
Thank you for making an essay. Your sentences are good and meaningful.  However, you have to be more aware of your grammatical errors and pronunciation lapses as well as you need to be careful with appropriate word usage and some articles in your sentences. Keep improving.  ~ Teacher QUENNY.. 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Please tell me something about the last concert you watched / Tell me about the recent sport you played. Tell me in as much detail as you can about the game.
>> Please tell me something about the last concert you watched / Tell me about the recent sport you played. Tell me in as much detail as you can about the game.(CORRECT) 
Actually I don¡¯t enjoy going to see concerts. So the last concert that I saw was when I went to the beer festival there were sone famous singers invited to that festival to make people exciting to enjoy the festival. The sing er performed hiphop and rock genre.
>> Actually, I don¡¯t enjoy going to see concerts. The last concert that I watched was when I went to the beer festival there were some famous singers invited to that festival to make people excited to enjoy the festival. The singer performed hip-hop and rock genres of music. 
The recent sport I played was bowling with my husband. Normally my husband does better than me. But on that day I have won the game! So it was extremely delightful that I had beat him. We actually bet the game fee before playing and because I won the game, I was able to play it for free.
>> The recent sport I played was bowling with my husband. Normally my husband does better in playing bowling than me. But one day I won the game! So I was extremely delighted that I had beaten him playing the bowling game. We actually bet the game fee before playing and because I won the game, I was able to play it for free. 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Please tell me something about the last concert you watched / Tell me about the recent sport you played. Tell me in as much detail as you can about the game.

Actually I don¡¯t enjoy going to see concerts. So the last concert that I saw was when I went to the beer festival there were sone famous singers invited to that festival to make people exciting to enjoy the festival. The singer performed hiphop and rock genre.

The recent sport I played was bowling with my husband. Normally my husband does better than me. But on that day I have won the game! So it was extremely delightful that I had beat him. We actually bet the game fee before playing and because I won the game, I was able to play it for free.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
123667 What are the classic video games that you grew up with? Can you... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-11-18 1932
123666 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-18 0
123665 The reason that we should choose friends wisely ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-11-18 0
123664 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-11-18 0
123663 What are three good things about America in your opinion? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-18 2231
123662 What is your opinion about the banning of standing passengers on... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-18 1812
123661 Friday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-11-18 1587
123660 I think the appropriate punishment for cyber-bullying ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-11-18 2012
123659 Do you think donating blood should be well-paid or always be... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-18 2049
123658 What kind of food do you like? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-18 1450
123657 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-18 1
123656 BUS ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-18 1520
123655 the result should be used so that it is not mistaken for the... ±è*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-18 1968
123654 What pleasant surprise did you notice today? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-18 0
123653 Why are there so many cafes in your country? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-11-18 0
123652 Do you think it¡¯s easy or difficult to find time to exercise... Àü*ä ¿Ï·á 2022-11-17 2378
123651 Is it a good idea for Minister Lee Sang-min to step down from... ±è*¹® ¿Ï·á 2022-11-17 2258
123650 Will you spend your leave or convert it into money? Share your... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-17 1607
123649 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-11-17 1782
123648 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-17 1424

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04