¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹Ú*¹Î
2022-12-12 1216

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Please tell me something about the last concert you watched / Tell me about the recent sport you played. Tell me in as much detail as you can about the game.

Actually I don¡¯t enjoy going to see concerts. So the last concert that I saw was when I went to the beer festival there were sone famous singers invited to that festival to make people exciting to enjoy the festival. The singer performed hiphop and rock genre.

The recent sport I played was bowling with my husband. Normally my husband does better than me. But on that day I have won the game! So it was extremely delightful that I had beat him. We actually bet the game fee before playing and because I won the game, I was able to play it for free.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Helen, 
Thank you for making an essay. Your sentences are good and meaningful.  However, you have to be more aware of your grammatical errors and pronunciation lapses as well as you need to be careful with appropriate word usage and some articles in your sentences. Keep improving.  ~ Teacher QUENNY.. 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Please tell me something about the last concert you watched / Tell me about the recent sport you played. Tell me in as much detail as you can about the game.
>> Please tell me something about the last concert you watched / Tell me about the recent sport you played. Tell me in as much detail as you can about the game.(CORRECT) 
Actually I don¡¯t enjoy going to see concerts. So the last concert that I saw was when I went to the beer festival there were sone famous singers invited to that festival to make people exciting to enjoy the festival. The sing er performed hiphop and rock genre.
>> Actually, I don¡¯t enjoy going to see concerts. The last concert that I watched was when I went to the beer festival there were some famous singers invited to that festival to make people excited to enjoy the festival. The singer performed hip-hop and rock genres of music. 
The recent sport I played was bowling with my husband. Normally my husband does better than me. But on that day I have won the game! So it was extremely delightful that I had beat him. We actually bet the game fee before playing and because I won the game, I was able to play it for free.
>> The recent sport I played was bowling with my husband. Normally my husband does better in playing bowling than me. But one day I won the game! So I was extremely delighted that I had beaten him playing the bowling game. We actually bet the game fee before playing and because I won the game, I was able to play it for free. 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Please tell me something about the last concert you watched / Tell me about the recent sport you played. Tell me in as much detail as you can about the game.

Actually I don¡¯t enjoy going to see concerts. So the last concert that I saw was when I went to the beer festival there were sone famous singers invited to that festival to make people exciting to enjoy the festival. The singer performed hiphop and rock genre.

The recent sport I played was bowling with my husband. Normally my husband does better than me. But on that day I have won the game! So it was extremely delightful that I had beat him. We actually bet the game fee before playing and because I won the game, I was able to play it for free.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
124002 homework ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-06 891
124001 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-06 704
124000 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-12-06 0
123999 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-06 1
123998 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-06 596
123997 Tuesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-06 750
123996 Based on your experience as a student, how has doing homework... ±è*¹® ¿Ï·á 2022-12-06 1723
123995 ¿µÀÛ Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-06 767
123994 What is your opinion on Premonitions? Are they real? Àü*ä ¿Ï·á 2022-12-06 793
123993 How do you feel when a client cannot keep a deadline? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-12-06 1
123992 Why is gambling addictive? Why? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-05 778
123991 Do illegal immigrants commit a lot of crimes? Why or why not? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-05 863
123990 Homework~~ ¹Ú*Çü ¿Ï·á 2022-12-05 599
123989 HOMEWORK: Make a sentence for each of the words: 1. ourselves 2.... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2022-12-05 1
123988 Homework~~ ¹Ú*Çü ¿Ï·á 2022-12-05 1007
123987 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-05 867
123986 What computer games do you think is popular among people your... ±è*¹® ¿Ï·á 2022-12-05 914
123985 Homework (12/05) ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-05 4
123984 homework ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-05 727
123983 Make a story about soccer games. ±è*À² ¿Ï·á 2022-12-05 731

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04